Having a supportive partner during tough times is the dream of every man or woman desiring a committed relationship.
This is why most people would rather go for substantial qualities than look when choosing a life time partner. At some point, looks may no longer matter, those pretty faces that once got you attracted will become a less priority. Those killer curves that often spark up your interest will no longer be a priority as reality gradually sets in and responsibility comes up.
This is when having a supportive partner becomes relevant than any other factors. Being so overwhelmed with work and having some one to cheer you up.
Being skeptical about the best career to opt for and having someone to guide you. Going through tough times in your business and career and having someone to offer you words of encouragement. Having financial set back and having someone to assist you.
All these are the most important aspects of relationship that cannot be over emphasized.
However relationship comes with lots of responsibility and commitment, hence not every relationship survives the heat. Some individuals will loose spark in their relationship as soon as they start experiencing difficult times, some will try to end it, some will become more toxic while others may ghost you, this is why being supportive partner can still be a challenging task even though you’re willing to help your partner pull through.
This article is not just aimed at stirring your interest to be a supportive partner, but on the effective ways to go about it in other not to loose your relationship in the process.
How to become a supportive partner during tough times.
1. understand your partner’s mood.
You were once a happy couple, the chemistry and attraction was so intense that you can’t do without each other.
You always confide in each other. But all of a sudden you began to notice an unexpected adjustment in your relationship.
Your partner is becoming more distant and cold, and the more you try to figure out the reason behind the sudden adjustment, the difficult it becomes, as they’ve refused to disclose the reason behind their coldness.
After so much persuasion, they finally opened up about their predicament. Alas, it wasn’t about you after all. but you’re willing to support them and stand by them through thick and thin, but unfortunately, it seems that the more you offer them your shoulder to lean on, the more they decline it.
Sometimes, you wonder if they are really going through tough times as they claim or deliberately avoiding you. I understand your frustration quite well, we’ve all been there and equally experienced such. However, no matter how frustrated you’re, you really need to understand them more at this time. Some challenges can make one loose interest in things they once held with high esteem.
There will be variations in their mood every now and then, commonly known as mood swings. Today, you’re good, tomorrow, they seems like a stranger, passing aggression on you. People have different ways of handling challenges, don’t assume you’ve lost them, all these are normal. To be a supportive partner during tough times, understand that this is just a phase that will soon pass.
2. Avoid being too pushy.
The second step of being supportive to your partner during tough times is to avoid being pushy. Just like I explained earlier, people have different ways of handling challenges. Some would gladly confide in their partner, while others will hide into their caves to avoid confrontations.
These kind of behavior is so common among men, due to their Egoistic nature and masculine trait.men are considered as a strong vessel, unlike their female counter part, hence the reason why they detest being a burden to anyone despite the closeness. They don’t want to be seen as weakling. Being able to solve their problem single handedly is one of the factors that boost a man’s EGO and confidence. It is normal to experience a drift in his availability even though you’re willing to encourage and support him.
At this point, resist the temptation of being too pushy or insisting he opens up. Don’t nag him if he isn’t ready to talk. It will make him pull away further, that he would start seeing your willingness to support as a disturbance instead.
As much as you’re willing to assist him, He may need space to process his emotions, please don’t argue on that. Give him that space, a heart lifting text message once in a while is a way to show him that you understand his need for space, but still available for him if he needs someone to talk to.
Contrary to your assumption of loosing him, he will value you more with this single act of emotional maturity. This will trigger his interest, and hasten his eagerness to come out of his cave and return to his normal self.
3. Be attentive to them.
Being a supportive partner during tough times entails possessing the virtue of empathy. And this empathy involves paying attention to your significant other. Perhaps, if you’re lucky to have one who still communicates to you during hard times, rather than ghost you, the best thing you can do for them is to give them your attention. Avoid judging them, even if you think they are the cause of their predicament.the last thing they want from you now is criticism, it will break them more. Give them words of encouragement that will uplift their spirit.
4. Be considerate with your demands.
This is not the best time to make financial or emotional needs. Remember they are down already, they might be experiencing a bankruptcy in their business, or a loss of contract/ job. And the least they want at that moment is additional pressure.
This is not the best time to ask for intimacy or romantic moments together. Remember it takes an emotionally stable mind to crave for romance or intimacy. Putting your selfish interest first at the expense of their predicament only shows you don’t value them enough.
4. Be patient.
I know you desperately miss those sweet and lovely moment you once shared as couples and can’t wait to have them back in your life again. It is frustrating seeing a drift in your love story, I quite understand that, but then, you have to focus on the mental state of your partner. If you truly love them, it is not easy on them either.
They are in the point of their life where emotional feeling is of less important to them. It doesn’t mean they don’t value the time you shared together, all they need from you at this point is patient. As long as their feelings for you is still intact, your love story will definitely rekindle some day, once they bounce back.
5. Avoid judging them.
To be a supportive partner during tough times, you have to more empathetic than judgmental. No matter what might have led to the situation they are expressing in their life, don’t judge them or consistently remind them that it was entirely their fault.
The goal is to rekindle their hope, and that won’t be possible if you’re always judging them on what they should or shouldn’t have done or reminding them of their past mistakes.
6. Pray for them.
This is the most effective way of becoming supportive partner during tough time is via prayers. While all other points mentioned above will only make them feel relieved and hopeful. Prayer is the only factor that will proffer solutions to their problem. If you really miss your love story, you have to constantly pray for them, so they can bounce back again.
