Is this actually a break or a break up? You kept asking yourself rhetorically. You can’t help but reminisce on his last statement.
” let’s take a break”. The statement seemed polite, it seemed as one which could resolve the issues you’re both having in your relationship. But then you’re scared. The word “Break” sends a cold shiver down your spine. What if he meant break up? These thoughts couldn’t stop running in your head. The more you try to resist them and become optimistic, the more they kept coming.
Perhaps, you might have been going through a lot in your relationship. A lot of misunderstanding, and sometimes fights. You’ve broken up and made up on several occasions after discovering that you both have a strong bond which can’t be easily detached. But yet, it doesn’t stop the crisis going on in your relationship.
Now, After series of mutual conversation, your partner thought it could be a wise decision if you both can give each other a break in other to ascertain what you both actually want from the relationship, and also to discover each other’s weak point and learn how to tolerate one another. During the conversation, you gave in to the decision, hence it was a mutual consent.
However, on getting home, you realized how bored life suddenly became without communicating with each other.
Despite your differences, you still had time to talk to each other, you spent lovely time together, but now you,ve began to miss all of that.
The memories of your good time together can’t stop ringing in your head. You wondered how long the break was gonna last, you are beginning to loose your grip out of fear and uncertainty.
Before you get paranoid, I want to let you know that Every relationship comes with its trying moment, up’s and down’s and challenges.
No relationship is perfect. But how both couples tends to handle the moment will determine the fate of the relationship at the end. It is not abnormal to ask for a break. When both parties often involve in constant arguments and fights.
Taking a break will enable them understand themselves better, reaffirm the objective of their relationship. Just like the saying, absence makes the heart grow fonder. Sometimes, constant arguments may be as a result of over- familiarity.
However, why it is normal to freak out, it is abnormal to object their decision on taking a break . Don’t let fear and Insecurity overcloud your sense a reasoning.
A lot of people will begin to nag and bug their partners with excessive calls and messages, which is a big turn off. It is necessary to know that your reaction to his decision will determine if the break will soon be over or linger on. No matter how paranoid you are, take a deep breath and calm your emotions.
The request for a break in a relationship might have actually led to a break up. But there are certain ways to determine if is really a break or a break up. Let’s discuss some of these factors.
5 ways to discover if is a break or a break up?
One of the ways to discover if your relationship is still in a slow pase or may have automatically ended is to check the level of communication between you both. Perhaps, you were having regular communication before you decided to slow down or take a break, taking a break entails not having a constant or an Excessive communication but does not imply no communication at all. Your communication level may decline at this point, but that does not imply that you will automatically ghost each other.
Check the last time he reached out to you since you began the slow pace. The duration of your communication matters at this point.
If he hasn’t reached out to you for two consecutive week or probably a month, you may have the need to worry, but don’t freak out. Just call his attention to it to ascertain his mind. If he still desires the relationship, he will be keen to know how you’re doing.
One of the ways to ascertain if it is actually a break or a break up is by observing his recent attitude.
You know how he usually updates you whenever there is a new happenings in his life. New job, promotion, challenges and so on. You’re usually the first to hear that. Now imagine, you just heard from his male friend that he’s mum is sick or that he’s moved from his apartment to another apartment, how will you feel ? agitated and disappointed right?
This is one of the obvious signs that the break is actually leading to a break up. There’s this feeling of negligence that follows this scenario. You will feel that you’ve lost your value in their life, hence no longer worth sharing or updating on the recent happenings in their life.
Making out time to resolve the issue
A Real break in a relationship is synonymous to asking for a space so both of you can concentrate more on understanding yourselves in a more concise way, working on your individual flaws and addressing the issue that normally pose as a bone of contention in your relationship.
At this point, what only tends to differ between your relationship now and then is in the expression of your emotions..you may not be so close romantically, but communication ought not to be lacking.
Not keeping flings.
One of the best ways to discover if it is really a break or a break up ? is to check their relationship status as soon as they asked for a break. Have they began to date someone else or start keeping a fling ?
Are they becoming emotionally attached to another member of the opposite sex? If yes, then that might call for a serious concern and worries.
A period of break is just a cooling off period especially for romantic affairs. And not the time to date other individuals. This is one of the obvious sign that he wants a break up as a lot of people has used that as an excuse to walk away from a relationship.
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