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10 signs he’s loosing interest in you and what to do.

 

Signs he's loosing interest in you
Loosing interest in you

 

Is he loosing interest in you? Perhaps you never saw this coming, you’ve planned your life together, he has introduced you to everyone that matters to him, he’s practically shown his commitment.

You both have gotten to the point that you never imagined that any thing can separate you again, the moment you realized that you are about to spend your forever with someone who has a significant role in your life, you just couldn’t wait for the forever to come.

However, just like is popularly said, life is unpredictable. The only constant thing in life is change, and it dawned on that you relationship is not an exception to this quote as you realized that your man is gradually loosing interest in you. The thought of starting this love journey all over again seems so overwhelming especially after building lots of good and unforgettable memories together .

You can’t help but remain optimistic with the assumption that they might be encountering some challenges and needed space to sort things out. However, while this thought might be a reality, it can as well be an illusion from your mind not to admit the truth that is sitting right before you. And so the question is, How can you know when he’s loosing interest and when he needed space to sort out his personal challenges.

Is he loosing interest in you?
Is he loosing interest in you

 

subtle signs that he’s loosing interest in you.

1. Decline in communication

One of the obvious sign that a man is loosing interest in you is that he will no longer reach out to you, especially if there was effective communication in the relationship wt the initial stage. Unlike women, Men don’t tend to hide their feelings for so long. It is their nature to hunt for their prey, so they will always go for whoever they desire to be with.

When a man is so into you, he will do everything to get your attention. He will always create time out of his busy schedules for you, even when it seems that you are not interested in him, he will keep chasing and being optimistic that one day you will give him the attention that he’s been craving.

However, when reverse becomes the case, and you see his energy depreciating, while yours keeps getting stronger, it is a sign that he’s loosing interest in you. They might not spill it out verbally, but the signs are just enough to make you realize that you’re no longer in the list of his priority. If we was only having challenges or overwhelmed with work, and he still loves you, the least he can do is to explain things to you and ask for time to sort it out. Giving you the silent treatment is a sign that he doesn’t want the relationship anymore.

2. He rarely keeps to his promise.

You once had a sweet man who keeps to his words, he doesn’t just make promises without any plans of fulfilling them, it is either he cancels his schedules or makes it up to you. When he starts making promises which he ends up not fulfilling, even with constant reminders, this is an obvious that he might be loosing interest in you.

Sometimes, people make promises so as to exonerate themselves from further pressures especially pressures coming from someone they no longer want to associate with.

While talking to them on phone, they can seek for your permission to attend to something more vital and urgent, in the guise to end the conversation, with the promise that they will call back, which they end up not calling.

3. Emotional disconnection –

One of the practical signs that a man is into you is his body language when you’re together.

There’s this desire to cuddle you, put up romantic gestures with you, get intimate with you, that is the relationship is an intimate one.

When he begins to act so distant and cold when you’re together, it is a sign of loss of interest, do not entertain any other excuse which he might come up with at that particular time.

4. He terminates every future plans with you.

You once planned on the career to settle with, the number of kids you’re both going to breed, and the interesting places to visit during your honeymoon .

But all of a sudden, they are no longer bringing up such plans, but rather shying away from such discussion whenever you bring it up, it is a clear indication that their interest is waning off.

5. He finds fault in everything you do.

Most men are not vocal when it comes to breaking up, they lack the guts to confront you with the truth especially when you did nothing wrong. but their actions and body language towards you at that moment is enough to signal that the relationship is over.

They yell at any slightest provocation, get mood swing every now and then especially when you’re around them. Hardly apologize even when they’ve wronged, but rather would play the victim card by accusing you of being a nag and insecure. This is a strong sign that a man who is tired of the relationship.

6. He constantly reminds you of your imperfection.

You’ve heard that Tolerance is one of the basic characteristics of true love, and that true love is patient overlooks certain flaws.

This saying was applicable at the initial stage in your relationship. You are not perfect, yet they still chose to be with you, you had flaws, yet they condoned it. Sometimes, you exhibit a character drives them crazy, yet they chose to be patient with you.

However, when you begin to notice their complaints over your imperfections which they initially accepted as part of you, it is a clear indication that they want out.

7. silent treatment.

No message can equally be regarded as a message. When someone who constantly communicates with you decided to go mute leaving in a blank state without any explanation, chances are that they don’t want you anymore in their life.

Have you been ghosted by a partner, you’ve done everything possible to reach out but all to no avail. At first, you were curious to know if everything is fine with them.

You’ve inquired from their friends who confirmed that they were okay, their online presence had also cleared your doubts as they are constantly online uploading and reacting to comments and status.

There’s no other reason that could be attributed to their behavior aside loss of interest. Trying to seek for closure at this point may be futile.

They are acting as a coward because they are scared of your reaction when they confront you with the truth, so they thought that the best way to go about the break up without making you to feel much hurt is to ghost you. Perhaps you will later get the message and move on.

8. Inconsistency.

Inconsistency in a relationship is an indication that one party is already having doubts over the relationship, and then maybe considering to back off. Men unlike women are always decisive, they know what they want and are always eager to pursue it at all cost.

You will naturally feel the vibe and energy when a man is into you. He will invest so much time, energy and resources to ensure that relationship is successful.

However, when a man who was once committed to you begins to blow hot and cold, there’s every tendency that he’s loosing interest in you.

9.He flirts with other women.

When a man is no longer interested in you, he won’t be scared of loosing you and so flirting with other women will be much easier for him.

Men respect women they cherish so much. Even when they intend to cheat or flirt, they do that secretly without rubbing it on her face.

10. He gives priority to his friends more than you .

Initially, he could reschedule his plans to see you, he could could postpone his appointment with his friends if is not an urgent one to meet you. But now, trying to get his attention is like a rocket science.

He would rather hang out with the boys than plan a date with you. He suddenly became so busy and unattainable. This is one of the obvious sign that he’s loosing interest in you.

what you should you do about it?

While these are signs indicating that a man is loosing interest in you, on the contrary, there might still be exceptions.

There are several other reasons that could be attested to his sudden change of character such as life challenges and mental stress.

The first thing is to reach out to him . Don’t conclude yet. If the communication lines are still open.

Try to find out what the actual problem is. Have a heart to heart discussion and insist on knowing his stance towards the relationship. He might get to open when he finds out that you’re adamant. If he says he’s not willing to talk about it, tell him you understand, and give him some time and space, if after that he’s still not willing to open up, then it is time to move on.

In the case of being ghosted, I think there’s absolutely nothing much to do than to move on. It is automatically assumed that the relationship is over, because it is a sign of disrespect to shut down on someone without any reason. Don’t beg for attention. It will only amount to further frustration.

How long should i wait before having sex?

Wait before having sex
Wait before having sex

 

How long should I wait before having sex? This is one of the most common questions people ask on daily basis, especially at the beginning of a new relationship.

Though sex might seem just like a physical act to some people, which no strings attached, to others it really means a lot that’s why they are being cautious so as to avoid anything that could lead to regrets in the future.

A new relationship is like a newly secured job, at first, you’re excited and so eager to resume. But along the line, feelings of anxiety begins to set in.

This anxiety can range from the fear of loosing one’s job or doing things that might attract sanction or penalty. This is the likely scenario that happens during a new relationship.

The fear of indulging in intimacy in the early stage and risking the tendency of having your partner loose the spark too sudden or having them cheat on you as a result of sex denial can be so excruciating. This often leads to a dilemma and the usual question. How long should I wait before having sex?

This question is commonly asked among women.

Reasons why women are eager to know the right time frame for having sex in a new relationship.

1. They are Emotional being– women are generally known as the weaker vessel. Unlike men, they attach emotion to everything including intimacy.

Unlike the female hormone The male hormone is primarily designed to ease the stress associated with sexual urges, this explains why men often feel relieved and detached as soon as they ejaculate, women on the other hand becomes attached and crave for intimate and romantic gestures such as cuddling.

Men wants space after sex, while women desires more intimacy and attachments. This is the Emotional differences In men and women.

So in other words they are often at the loose end, hence the reason for the question. Should I wait before having sex? And the curiosity to know the right frame of time, to have it.

2. Afraid of being jilted.

Having observed that some men withdraw after intimacy, the fear of becoming intimate with a man at the beginning of a relationship keeps surfacing every now and then.

The urge to indulge in the act a times is mutual. Just like the male hormone, the female hormone is programmed to naturally feel the need of emotional attachment at a particular period in a woman’s reproductive cycle known as ovulation.

However, the feelings of exploitation surfaces, if a woman succumbs to this urge and gets jilted. Especially if there’s a string attached and she desires to have a committed relationship, thereafter.

That’s why some women are not eager to succumb to this urge, hence the question, how long should I wait before having sex?

Wait before having sex
Wait before having sex

3. To avoid being tagged desperate .

Desperation is one of the Biggest turn off for men. To most women, having a man wait for sex boosts their self confidence and esteem. It is part of playing hard to get.

Hence they believe that keeping him waiting will stir up his interest more. However, while this may be true in some scenarios, its not applicable in most cases.

3. To avoid societal discrimination.

When it comes to the issue of pre marital sex, women are mostly the victims and the most discriminated against.

Female’s virginity is mostly taken into consideration and seen as a priority than that of male. Men can have as much flings as they wish to, but when it comes to women, it is mostly frowned against.

A woman who have so many body counts and sexual encounters is considered an indecent woman and in some cases, a sex hawker. Hence the reason why women are being cautious on being intimate with the right person and at the right time.

Would delaying for sex guarantee the longevity of your relationship?

Before asking the question how long should I wait before having sex? You should first ask yourself if there’s any positive effect of having to wait, would the wait worth it at the end? Would it guarantee the success of the relationship?

Weather you’ve decided to wait for one months, six months or one year, it wouldn’t have any effect. What is bound to happen will happen. In other to avoid regrets, treat intimacy as a personal decision rather than as a means to secure the heart of your significant other.

You have the right to your body, the decision to share it with another should be solely yours. One of your values in life should be having a will to stick to your personal decision and principles, if remaining celibate in your relationship is your goals, don’t succumb to the pressures of sex. Easy right? Hell no! You might develop the phobia that if you didn’t compromise you will loose your relationship, your partner will jilt you and find someone else. All these are mere assumptions and speculations.

There are factors that determines the longevity of a relationship. These factors gives the best answers to your question should I wait before having sex? And how long should I have to wait.

These factors will determine how long you need to wait before having sex in a new relationship.

1. Interest of your partner

Like I emphasized earlier, the criteria that will determine the success of your relationship is not based on how long you wait for sex, but the intention of your partner.

Their motive of being in a relationship with you. Are they with you just for momentarily pleasure or to start a lasting union with you. If former is the case, then no matter how long you wait to be intimate with them, once they have their way, they will jilt you, leaving you traumatized.

The assumption that waiting for a while before becoming intimate with your partner will stir their interest and make them more attached to you is a fallacy. Some players who are only interested in fling

Are willing to wait as long as you’re willing to give in, and as soon as you succumb, they jilt you and move on to the next victim. Some might have experienced this in their previous relationship, and then think they might have given too early. But that is not the case. Whoever has genuine interest in you will never leave no matter how soon you get intimate with them. It’s all about intentions.

2. commitment .

Commitment is synonyms to investment. Before people invest, they are certain of the result that will show forth after their investment. People hardly invest where there’s no yield.

How committed your partner is to your relationship will determine the aftermath of being intimate with them soon.

When someone invest hugely on you, I’m not referring to the scenario of being paid off after sex, but investing his resources and time towards your personal growth and career, it clearly indicates that they want you for long term keeps.

In that case, you have no reason to worry about being or not being intimate with them, or having it so soon or waiting for a certain period of time, it will make no difference.

3. your perception about sex.

Like I explained earlier, sex should be a personal decision and not purpose oriented.

People who have sex for fun or consent to it mutually have no reason to fear of having at the wrong time.

They easily move on and never feels exploited if the relationship eventually didn’t work out as expected.

On the contrary, if you’re one those people intentional about your sexuality due to religion or decision to remain celibate, the best decision is to stick to your principle, so you don’t feel emotionally destabilize if they jilt you after sex.

4. Your Emotional stability.

Some people become Emotionally attached as soon as intimacy takes place in a relationship. Such people finds it difficult to move on or detach when things goes south, they become so obsessed with their Ex, stalking them every now and then or threatening to hurt themselves or their Ex for messing up with their emotions.

Before deciding to get intimate with anyone on a relationship, make sure you’re emotionally stable especially when they haven’t shown any sign of commitment.

5. your past sexual Encounters in relationship.

Another essential factors that will influence your decision on how long you need to wait before having sex is your past sexual encounters.

You recalled how you made a vow not to be intimate with your ex. At first, they obliged and promised to wait as long as you’re willing to give in.

Everything was going as expected, not until they began to mount inexplicable pressures on you, regardless of your decision. You pleaded with them for more time to re evaluate your decision, but all to no avail as they remained adamant. You had no choice than to oblige as you were too scared to loose them.

But unfortunately, they still jilted you despite their promises to stick to you against all odds. Same scenario happened in other subsequent relationships you’ve been into. And now you are skeptical on the right time to engage in intimacy.

The best way to get out of this scenario at this point is to either give a break to sex or observe them to see their level of commitment, especially as it regards to your future needs.

11 ways to overcome depression due to delay in marriage

Depression due to delay in marriage
Depression due to delay in marriage

Depression due to delay in marriage can be a life threatening challenge, especially if one’s life is in contrary to the original plans and dreams.

It is quite normal to feel sad when it seems you’re lagging behind in any aspect of life especially among your peers.

That feelings of envy whenever a friend sends you an invitation of his or wedding ceremony is normal, that awkward moment you log on to social media to curb boredom, only to see the pictures of newly wedded couples pop in your timeline is enough to avert your mood.

Seeing your mates getting a nice job, moving into their permanent apartment while you are still struggling with your life can be overwhelming.

You can’t erase this feelings, it is part of what makes us human. Having a sense of emotions which could result to either an exciting or sad mood. We can only learn to cope with the depression that often comes with it.

One of the greatest challenge people face is not the fact that they haven’t achieved what they ought to achieve at a certain age, but the pressures associated with it.

The pressure most times is the reason for the depression. The pressures can emerge from various source such as the family, the society and social media.

In some families especially in African, once you’ve attained a marriageable age and haven’t gotten married, everyone sees you as a failure.

Your opinion will no longer count, every discussion will be channeled to marriage and finding a life partner.

In the society, the pressure is more on women, as a result of the biological nature of women. Having to attain menopause at a certain age without having a family of one’s own.

The pressures on social media can be overwhelming too. Seeing every timeline and post channeled on marriage and family when one is single can be traumatizing.

However, depression due to marriage delay can still be handled if one apply the right measures. So what are these measures.

11 ways to overcome depression due to delay in marriage.

Pressure due to delay in marriage
Depression  due to delay in marriage

1. Self reliance and contentment.

The most challenging factor for singles as they attain a marriageable age is accepting who they are and not trying to compare themselves with their peers or colleagues.

This is not always easy, as the urge to get married keep rising whenever a colleague or a friend walks down the isle.

However, it is not impossible. It starts with the mindset. Think of other achievements you have in life, which some of your friends are yet to attain.

Think of your life and good health which some are battling with. Think about your lovely family around you, not everyone have that privilege of having a family around.

Some grew up without knowing who their parents are. But you have all this, it is something to be grateful for. Understanding this will enable you realize that our destiny varies as we journey through life. Some are destined to achieve certain things before others. We can’t all get to our destination at the same time, but one thing is certain. We will surely get to our destination.

2. work on your self esteem.

Depression due to delay in marriage can be overcome by working on your self esteem. People with low esteem easily succumb to depression over any situation because they consider themselves so weak to face the reality.

This low esteem often begins with dependence. Depending on every factor for their happiness . So many of them struggle in relationship and often rely on others for their happiness, thus leading to depression when no suitor is coming.

3. Avoid desperation.

One of the major cause of depression due to delay in marriage is desperation.

most times when you struggle so hard to acquire something, you hardly get it, but when divert your attention from it, it shows up at time you least expected.

Be optimistic that one day your expectations will turn to reality, but for the moment,re channel your mind and energy into other productive things like hobby, work, skills and career. Desperation a times leads to wrong decision. And this wrong Decision can ruin your life, if you make the wrong choice of partner. Better to be late than to be wrong.

4. Build positive friends around you .

Depression due to delay in marriage, can be overcome by building positive friends.

Friends who understands life principles, friends who are so conversant with life challenges, friends with diverse experience in life, such friends may likely have similar experience with you.

Find solace being in their midst of others, especially when they have some words of encouragement to dish out to you.

Hearing other people’s experience can help to reshape your mind and reignite your lost hope. Avoid friends who are always curious to know about your relationship status or marital status. In summary, keep the right circle of friends. Build a connection of like minded individuals. They will help to influence your mind positively.

5.change your location.

For you to overcome a challenge,you must find out what triggers it, and work on it.

What is the major cause of the depression you’re facing to get married? It could be your parents or siblings?

Are they mounting so much pressure on you that you’re beginning to loose your sanity.. if yes? Moving out may be your last and best resort at the moment to save your sanity.

Do you resides in an environment where it seems nothing else matters aside marriage. This could be a threat to your peace. It’s high time to make necessary adjustment to save your sanity.

6. Avoid isolation.

Isolation is the reason why people fall easily into depression when they are going through hard times.

It gets easier when you are around people who makes you feel relieved, it gets easier when you often talk about your issues, it gets easier when you confide in a trusted friend or family, it gets easier when you hang around with people who makes you feel at home.

However, it doesn’t necessarily mean you should go ahead publicizing your challenges to every dick and Harry to attract pity. Apply caution while trying to share your burdens with others.

7. Talk to a therapist.

Sometimes, depression due to delay in marriage can be so overwhelming that no matter how you try to get rid of it, it gets worse, at this juncture there may be need to seek the counsel of a qualified therapist in the field. As that will hasten your healing process.

8. Diversify your life style.

No matter how important marriage is, it is still not the key to a complete fulfillment of life, it only fulfills one aspect of life. This is one important factor Every singles should know.

There’s a sense of fulfillment in other aspects of life such as finding a new hobby, learning a new skill, taking up a new career, leading a group of people to attain their goals, organizing seminars which is aimed at impacting people’s life, when you understand these other aspects of life, you will have no reason to be depressed over marriage.

When you’re passionate about other areas of your life, it will help you think less of marriage, which will definitely come in the least expected time. This is an effective way of overcoming depression due to delay in marriage.

9. Be committed to spiritual activities.

If you’re a christian, your relationship with God at this point in life should be very cordial, it ought to be your utmost priority as you’re working earnestly to achieve other things.

Attending christian gatherings will help you build a positive mindset to your challenge.

Your situation can be addressed as led by God, and when that happens, you will experience a sense of relief. This can be effective in dealing with depression due to delay in marriage.

10. Be prayerful.

Pressures due to delay in marriage can be overcome by devoted prayers. When you are led by the spirit of God, you will experience peace and serenity.

Sometimes, peace is difficult to attain irrespective of the measures one adopt. Depression is a reflex action we have no control over, Don’t relent in prayer, when every other physical method have failed, prayer shouldn’t even be the last resort, it should be a priority . The spirit of God can endow you with inexplicable happiness if you rely solely on it.

Don’t loose hope.

Depression due to delay marriage can be overcome by keeping your hopes alive. A times, the fear and anxiety of not having things often lead to the possibility of becoming depressed about it.

Loosing hope can deter your chances of getting married because you may not feel the need to look attractive, you may not feel the need to attend functions and exciting places, you may not feel the need to hang out with friends, depression can making you look unkempt which will ruin your chances of getting attention from eligible bachelors or spinsters.

Some challenges of life requires keeping your hope alive.

13 types of women you shouldn’t date.

Women you shouldn't date
Women you shouldn’t date

There are women you shouldn’t date or get married to if you’re considering achieving success in life and having a long life span. I know a lot of men would argue with this? A lot will find this sarcastic. How can you link your success to a woman when you can actually work hard, and attain any goal you wish to?

However, there’s more to success than just the amount of currency one have in his bank account. Whoever you decides to spend the rest of your life with will determine the tendency of your life soaring higher or declining. And that is why it is crucial to make the right choice of a woman.

What do men want in life? What are the basic factors that determines a man’s success in life? Peace, financial stability and Respect.

This is to say that a man cannot function well if these three factors are lacking in his life. His choice of woman largely depends on these three factors that is, if he has the intention of getting married.

Having known these, it is necessary that every man should have an in-depth knowledge and understanding about the kind of woman she intends to settled down with to avoid going back to square one in life.

12 kinds of women you shouldn’t date.

1. Materialistic women .

One of the women you shouldn’t date if you intend to maintain your success in life are materialistic women.

As mentioned earlier, financial stability is one of the top factors that determines a man’s success rate. It is often said that behind every successful man, there’s a woman.

A lot of people are yet to grasp the true meaning of the slogan . It doesn’t necessarily mean that a woman is solely behind the success of a man, however, it does mean that a man can only secure his resources when there’s no wasteful woman to drain his effort. A woman who only craves for luxury, but not interested on how you invest your money into productive things is wasteful.

A woman who only thinks about how to look good without considering the basic necessities in the home is materialistic. Women are meant to be helper and not liabilities. Don’t ignore such Red flags during dating or courtship.

Women you shouldn't date
Women you shouldn’t date

2. Nagging women.

A Nagging woman is a threat to peace. Imagine coming back from a hectic day, expecting a warm reception from your wife, but on the contrary, you were welcomed with yelling over an issue which could have been settled by mutual communication. This is why most married men would rather spend their time hanging out with their fellow guys after work.

However, avoiding a nagging woman doesn’t necessarily mean you shouldn’t pay attention to her complaint to know where you should do necessary adjustment. Giving a woman audience is still necessary, and that is if she requests to have a mutual communication with you, not by yelling and attracting the attention of others via her loud voice.

Nagging disrupts peace, you can only know when there’s peace in union if there’s cravings to return home as soon as you’re done with work.

3. INSECURE WOMEN .

One of the women you shouldn’t date are insecure women.

They can make you loose focus, friends and trust. Jealousy is part of love, being a bit insecure shows that you really love and value your partner and wouldn’t like to loose them.

We all love to protect things we value at all cost. However, there should be a limit and balance to that. Dating an insecure woman can lead to loss of freedom, imagine being questioned about your movement, anytime you hang out with your fellow guys, imagine not having a good relationship with your friends at work whom you solely discuss business ideas with all because your woman suspects you’re having an affair with them. Such can be heart wrenching .

4. OBSESSIVE WOMEN.

One of the women you shouldn’t date are obsessive women. obsession may seem like love, but most times, it is an extreme form of insecurity.

Obsessed people can go to any length to proof their love including harming you or harming themselves.

Their usual lines are “if I can’t have you no one else can. They are triggered easily by their emotions and equally act based on their emotions, which often times leads to making a regrettable mistakes.

5. Women who keep multiple male friends.

Everyone can make friendship with the opposite sex, irrespective of their relationship status. However, there are exceptions to this as regards to boundaries and how this friendship operates.

When a woman is always seen around with multiple men, weather in the form of best friends or colleagues that could be tagged as a red flag.

When a woman truly loves you, she will be emotionally drawn to you alone and intentionally scare other men away. Unlike men, women are not polygamous in nature, except she doesn’t want anything serious with you, and just want to string you along. This is why you must avoid dating women who keeps multiple male friends, because most times, they keep them for their selfish interest.

6. Desperate women.

How can you identify a desperate woman? Her quest to get things done at all cost without weighing the consequences or challenges that lies within.

A desperate woman can lure you into marriage with fake attitude and good character in disguise. Only to be met with disappointment as soon as you discover that she’s nothing close to the character she portrayed earlier while you were still dating. It can lead to life time regrets in the life of a man.

7. Women who still get along with their Ex.

One of the women you shouldn’t date are women who are still in good terms with their Ex. It doesn’t mean one should be enemies with their Ex”s. But watch out for constant communications from their Ex. It is a sign that something is still going between them.

Sometimes, when a relationship ends for some reasons. Two people involved can be apart, while their feelings may still be intact especially if the relationship ended due to reasons beyond their control.

In such scenario, it might be difficult for a woman to fight the feelings if there’s a re established communication, thereby making her to succumb. This is because women are known as emotional beings and weaker vessels. It only takes discipline for them to resist. And not every women are in possession of this discipline.

8. AGGRESSIVE and HOT TEMPERED WOMEN.

In the list of factors needed for a man to attain success. Peace of mind also tops the list. Every man needs peace to function and this peace can’t be accessible, if you’re dealing with a woman with anger issues. We all have our flaws as individuals, however some flaws can never be managed no matter how one try to condone it. Temperament is a very common flaw, but there extreme cases especially one involved with destroying things at the peak of anger. Some ladies possess such attitude which is not healthy for you as a man.

9. Clingy and Needy women.

A clingy woman can pose distraction especially at the peak of your hustles. Imagine dating a woman who wants your attention 24/7. Imagine dating a woman who calls you every hour to know who you’re with and what you’re doing. Imagine having a woman who flares up and because you didn’t respond to her text immediately. Imagine dating a woman who pictures a cheating scenario in her mind just because you missed a call. Isn’t that synonymous to bondage?

In as much as effective communication necessary in a healthy relationship, having one’s space is equally paramount. Sometimes, you may need your space as a man to reevaluate your life, and make adequate planning, but having a woman who needs your attention all the will derail such plan.

10. Drama queen.

One of the women you shouldn’t date for your peace of mind are the drama queen. How can you identify them? They are often indecisive, can’t make a decision and stick to it. Today, they complain of not getting adequate attention from you, you try to give them attention, they start ignoring you and acting distant. They want you and at the same time, put up attitude that gets you paranoid. Avoid such women at all cost.

11. Inconsistent women..

They are the worst of all. Knowing that someone does not want you because they’ve made it clear to you through their actions or spoken words is preferable than having someone leading you on every now and then and withdrawing back their feelings as soon as you’ve started developing feelings for them.

Women who behave in such way are not ready for commitment, probably because they have so many options which they intentionally kept for their selfish purposes.

They are time wasters. As a responsible man who craves for a successful life and lovely family, you’ve to make your choice among women who knows what they want and are ready to stick to it.

12. promiscuous women.

One of the women you shouldn’t date are the promiscuous women. They may appear flashy and enticing to be with, however, you have think beyond your feelings and emotions.

Promiscuous women have a great tendency for cheating in marriage, don’t date them with the expectation that they will change later. People rarely change especially when their character has become a habit developed over a long period of dating.

Aside infidelity, promiscuous women can influence your kids with negative lifestyle. People only flaunt and give out what they are in possession of. A woman can’t give morals and discipline to her kids if she isn’t in possession of one.

13. The opportunist.

One of the women you shouldn’t date are the opportunist. When you woo a lady and she declined at first, but later discovers how resourceful you are and decides to accept your proposal, she’s an opportunist. When a lady who often ignores you only gives you an attention when she needs your assistance, and then goes back to her usual behavior after her needs have been met, she’s a big time opportunist. If you’re considering anything serious from a woman, you need to avoid such categories of women to avoid

Should I feel jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex?

Jealous by my partner's friendship with the opposite sex
Jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex

Is it necessary to feel jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex? Do I need to worry my self about loosing my relationship if my partner has lot of male or female friends. Does friendship with the opposite sex often ruin a relationship?

These are one of the common questions a lot of people ask on regular basis. The fear of loosing a loved one to another is very common, especially in a relationship that has been defined. It’s normal to feel paranoid when your partner is beginning to get too close to a member of the opposite sex.

However, some of these fears are often triggered by negative imaginations arising as a result of insecurities .

jealousy in relationship could be a sign of love, it is normal to be scared of loosing someone you truly love. It’s normal to occasional have that phobia that your relationship might end especially when you observe that your partner is beginning to get unnecessarily close to someone of the opposite sex. However, these fear becomes abnormal when it goes too extreme.

A lot of people have ruined their relationship because they keep assuming things which is not in existence, their instincts makes them believe that their partner’s colleague might be their secret lover.

They kept on suspecting and suspecting till they drove their partner away as a result of their insecurities.

So should I feel jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex? The answer to this question first depends on knowing who you are dating? Their life styles, and how they relate with the opposite sex.

Dating doesn’t mean you ain’t gonna relate with others who might have something valuable to offer. But it all depends on how close this relationship is, and the boundaries they set in other not to ruin their relationship.

Some jealousy in relationships are normal, while some are unhealthy. You first have to know what triggers your jealousy in other to find out if they are normal or not.

You will know that jealousy is unhealthy, when you haven’t gotten any proof that shows that your partner might be cheating on you. You’re just being afraid of the unknown.

Should I feel jealous by my partner's friendship with the opposite sex? 1

why do I feel jealous over my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex?

1. Inferiority complex-

inferiority complex has a great negative toll when it comes to relationship. People who don’t have confidence in themselves would always see everyone around their partner as a rival.

Every action to them is being interpreted as infidelity. Sometimes, the problem could be you. To answer the question. Why do I always feel jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex, you need to work on your self esteem.

2.lack of emotional stability.

People who lack emotional stability often times develop phobias over the authenticity of their loved life. The fear of being dumped or jilted often surface every now and then. This fear is being triggered by their past experiences, hence they find it difficult to move on.

3. lack of trust.

Why do I feel jealous by my partner’s friendship? Sometimes this jealousy is as a result of lack of trust. Trust is a very essential factor in a healthy relationship.

Lack of trust creates room for unnecessary suspicion and fear. Trust is one of the criteria that determines the longevity of a relationship. And trust is earned. If you’re in a relationship where you find it difficult to trust your partner. There’s every tendency that such relationship will never last.

So what? Should I feel jealous by my partner’s friendship? Having known what triggers this fear, the next is to find out if this fear is really worth it. Or you’re just getting unnecessarily paranoid which is unhealthy for your relationship and cause your significant other to start loosing interest in the relationship.

And that leads us to the next article when should your partner’s friendship with the opposite sex be a source of concern to you.

when should I be bothered by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex?

1. if they have become secretive.

If your relationship have been a transparent one right from the onset, and then all of a sudden, they began to exhibit some signs secrecy, hiding things every now and then, including their mobile phones, then there’s a course for alarm especially when there is an opposite sex figure in the picture. If they have no strings attached, I don’t think it will be necessary hiding anything from you.

2. Deleting Text messages and chats.

When should I feel jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex? When you discover their usual habit of wiping off text messages and chats. You may not have caught them being intimate. But deleting of messages indicates they have skeleton on their cupboard and that could be termed as Emotional cheating.

3. loosing focus and attention from you.

Have you been seeing your partner with someone lately whom they claim they are just friends with, but then your relationship is no longer the same, they hardly pay attention to you during conversation, they seems lost that you have to call their names repeatedly in other to call their attention back.

There’s every tendency that they have something going on with that person.

Hence always being accept minded whenever you’re together. Except you’re certain that they are really bothered with a challenge ranging from their business or work place.

4. Not setting boundaries .

Having a friendship of the opposite sex is not entirely bad, after all we need each other’s influence to succeed By building strong connections every now and then.

Some people are really good in maintaining a strong circle that consists of both male and female gender. They may have tons of female friends. However, this female friends shouldn’t take the place of their partner if they happen to be in a committed relationship .

There should be boundaries on the kind of friendship and closeness your partner have with others. Entertaining all form of intimacy in the guise of friendship is deceptive. Being with a close friend in secluded places can stir up emotions by one or both of them.

What should you do if your observations are true?

The mistake a lot of people tend to make at this point is approaching the situation in a wrong way, which could drive them further away. So what’s the best way to approach it.

1. Communication .

Nagging may seem like the best way to handle the situation, but that could only alleviate it. Confront them, not in an aggressive manner, but in a mutual way. Give them a benefit of doubt and a listening ear to explain their own part.

2. Leave the relationship.

There’s no point sticking around where you’re not valued. If you’ve done all you can, yet nothing seems to have changed. It may be the best time to quit. Anyone who loves you would respect you at all times and won’t put you in a rivalry position.

9 types of men you should avoid

Types of men you should avoid
Types of men you should avoid

There are several kinds of men you should avoid as a woman who craves to be in a committed and fruitful relationship.

Before we go into details in listing these set of men and why you should avoid dating them, we have to look at some of the emotional needs of a woman and what they desire to get in a relationship.

Emotional needs of a woman.

Attention

This is the most significant need of women. Women are emotionally inclined, they are fragile in nature, they are said to be a weaker vessel than their male counter part.

They have the same characteristics as that of babies, and that is, the desire to be loved and cherished, the desire to be attended to whenever the need arises, the desire to be seen as a priority.

Protection .

Women loves protection a lot. And that’s why they are mostly drawn to men with masculine feature that makes them feel relaxed and safe. The masculine energy is one of the attractive feature in men that makes every lady to want to be around him. There’s this excitement that women often feels when a man holds holds her tight while walking together in a lonely night, or wraps his hands around her to cuddle her during cold nights.

Words of affirmation

This is one of the best love language for every woman. Women loves it when they are appreciated over their looks,dressing and skills.

They love it when you overlook their weak point and focus more on their strength.

They love it when you correct them with love by first appreciating their effort. They love it when you remind them of how beautiful and gorgeous they look.

Financial support –

A woman doesn’t have to be materialistic before she craves to be supported by her man.

Giving is an act of affection, women sees it as a romantic gesture, whenever a man tries to support them in any form. It is not the worth of the gift that matters, but the thought of knowing that you have a man who finds it worthy to render his financial support in the form of gift or other means.

Financial support is also a sign of commitment . Men will only spend their resources on woman they desire to have a future with, and that’s why women often recognize that as one of their emotional need.

 

Types  of men you should avoid.

Men who scared of commitment.

There are lots of signs that will indicate he is scared of commitment. One of such sign is ignoring any discussion about the future. No matter how a man claims to love you, if he’s not ready to commit, it shows how un serious he’s and irrelevant he sees your relationship with him. Even if he takes care of you, and offers you gifts every now and then, but shy away from future discussion, please don’t take such men serious, except you just want a fling just like he does. Most times, they already have a serious relationship elsewhere, but just want to catch fun with you.

However, if you’re considering building a a healthy relationship , dating such kind of men will be an absurd idea.

Types of men you should avoid
Types of men you should avoid

men who play hard to get.

While, It is normal for anyone to play hard to get in other to make the intending partner see their worth and value, however, making it extreme could signal pride and EGO.

Men are naturally hunters, they find it more easy and convenient approaching a woman than the other way round.

It’s still normal for a plan to play a little bit hard so as to avoid being pushy in other to make his worth visible, but doing that for too long depict a man who values his EGO more than you. Dating him means you have to keep massaging his ego in other to sustain the relationship.

men who finds it hard to apologize-

These kind of men never owns up to their mistake, let alone render an apology. They always feels that apologizing to a woman is not a masculine feature, hence will always play the victim, while you act as the offender.

These are the kind of men you should avoid. Considering them for marriage, will be at the detriment of your peace and sanity because as far as they are concerned, they can never be wrong, they will rather go silent on you than use the simple five lettered word “sorry”. If you’re dating such kind of man, you may need to rethink, else you will keep making excuses for his wrongs, while he acts like nothing happened.

Non vocal men.

The worst kind of men to date are those men who can’t express their emotions. Sadness, excitement and whatever. I know it sounds absurd right?not having a man who yell at you at a slightest provocation or calls your attention back when provoked by you may seem like the best thing that can happen to you.

But unfortunately, it could be the worst thing to ever happen to you. Men like this are mostly unpredictable. You can’t read their minds to know what their next action will be. Rather than pour out their emotions, they will result to silent treatment.

They are ready to ghost for as long as they wish, than telling you what the problem is.

Such men don’t care about their emotions, but only what will boost their EGO. It is better to be with a man who may yell at you and then be calm, than a bitter soul who would rather act, than speak.  effective relationship. is important in every relationship.

Men who talks a lot.

In the list of men you should avoid, men who talks a lot are equally included.

Having a man who doesn’t open up is a red flag, but then, opening up doesn’t always have  to mean being a talkative.

Men who discusses their bedroom escapades with their fellow men are not yet matured for marriage.

From such discussions, bad advise from negative folks can be generated. If you observe that you are dating “A kiss and tell guy”, quickly end that relationship before it gets to ruin you.

Marriage shouldn’t have any third party interference except in the form of marriage counselor or a trusted friend which may be sought for when the need arises or during marital crisis.

Men with multiple female friends..

Another kind of men you should avoid are men with multiple female friends. There’s nothing absolutely wrong with a man having female friends even while in a committed relationship.

However, watch it, when you’re dealing with a man who relates with random girls. Pay attention to how intimate he’s with them.

A man who values his woman shouldn’t bee seen getting unnecessarily close to other women.

Even if they are the one throwing themselves at him, he will find it easy to resist them, if truly he wants something serious from you. Here’s entering the distractions because he sees no difference between you and those girls in his fun list.

You shouldn’t be dating a guy who makes you feel insecure and jealous every now and then .

Healthy boundaries should be maintained to sustain a healthy relationship.

Men still in contact with their Exes.

Men who still entertain frequent calls and visits from an ex are one of those men you should avoid dating at all cost.

Memories are not just erased, sometimes, it could stirred by constant communications.

No matter their excuses, tell them you ain’t comfortable with it, if they can’t stop, you’re better off single than having to condone such disregards.

men who lie –

Another kind of men you should avoid are men who lie. It doesn’t matter if they are lying to save the relationship, a dishonest person can’t be trusted. He or she’s capable of betraying one’s trust.

A man who genuinely wants to be with you, will be open to you, even amid of mistakes, he will open up and apologize. Getting to find the truth by yourself when they’ve obviously lied to you could be more traumatizing.

Men who are not generous.

A man doesn’t have to be wealthy before gifting or taking care of the woman she loves.

If he hasn’t thought it wise to share the little one he has with you, he will still not share the big ones if it eventually comes.

You’re planning to marry a man but he has never deemed it fit to send you any little surprises even on your eventful days like birthday, that is a red flag, such kind of attitude will certainly be extended in marriage.

what you can’t tolerate in relationship shouldn’t be tolerated in marriage as well

8 ways to make your partner realize your worth.

Realize your worth
Realize your worth

Your partner can only realize your worth, when you stop doing those things that made you loose your worth in the first place.

Being in love could be the most exciting phase in an individual’s life, However, it can equally be a daunting experience, when you’re being taken for granted.

It is Natural to fall helplessly in love, the hormones that triggers love feelings induces a kind of excitement that makes you obsessed with the one you’re in love with.

This obsession is the reason why so many think less about themselves in a relationship, but rather sees their partner as a major priority. If the obsession ain’t controlled, it will get a point, where they have to struggle to regain their worth.

This could be challenging, especially when you’re head over heels in love with someone. You can’t help it, but express your feelings, you’ve been severally warned to reserve some part of your heart to yourself to avoid it being shattered. However, you can’t still help it, your love is genuine and that’s why you want to express it all. But there’s a problem. The energy is not mutual, your presence and effort is not valued. It seems like the more your express it, the more your value diminishes. It finally got to a stage where you’ve lost every respect or regard they have for you.

At that point, your priority is no longer to have your feelings reciprocate. But to make them realize your worth. At least if they can see your worth again, maybe, tables will turn around for your good.

So how can you make a partner realize your worth?

15 ways to make a partner realize your worth.

Become less available and scarce

I know you might be wondering why someone who claims to love you will get tired of your presence and wish for space. Now let’s use this an illustration.

When you purchase a new item, you’re so much obsessed with it right? If it’s a cloth item, there’s an intense urge to wear it every now and then, you may decide it to save it up for special occasions.

Do you notice that whenever an occasion sprung up, and you remember that you will be putting on the cloth, you will feel a great deal of excitement.

However, Reverse seems to be the case, if you often wear it. There will one a time when it will begin to wear off, and then the value will diminish. The same scenario is applicable to relationship.

Having the same routine of being with your partner every now and then will make them become use to it. And you know what follows thus? Value depreciation.

People love new adventures, other than routine, that explains the reason why wearing a cloth too often will reduce it’s value. If you notice that your partner is beginning to make you feel disrespected. Reduce the rate at which you visit them, or communicate with them.

Realize your worth
Realize your worth

Avoid a stagnant life.

To make your partner realize your worth, get an upgrade for your life, get new hobbies, get new skills, learn new crafts. Get busy with your life generally.

Imagine they’re busy in the office attending to a client, while you bug their phone with calls and tons of text messages,

The outcome is that they will get furious and begin to decline your calls. Declining your calls indicates that their value for you is diminishing. It literally means you’re distracting them, and that will definitely pull them farther away. you can avoid all these by getting busy with work, skill or a business, with that you won’t need to be ringing them every now and then or showing up at their place unannounced.

Build an active Network –

To make a partner realize your worth, it is necessary you build a network of people with prestige .

The kind of company we keep a times determines how people rate us. If you keep friends who have nothing to offer, they might influence your lifestyle too, in that way, the value they have for your partner will begin to diminish.

Build your social life

You maybe an introvert, but there’s every need to improve on your social life. Your social life will keep you much busy from always contacting your partner and disrupting their activities.

You wonder why your partner seems to be getting tired of your frequent check ups and company?

Adventures are the spice of life. Maintaining one routine all the time can stir up boredom. If you’ve always been around them and you notice that they are beginning to avoid your presence, the best thing you can do to make them realize your worth is to hang out with other friends and renew your social life.

Get a job, don’t depend on them for upkeep.

Depending on someone for upkeep is the easiest way to stir up disrespect. It might sound as though they really care about you, and wouldn’t mind doing anything for you.

However, no matter how much they care about you, don’t forget that they are human too. We all crave for support. We all crave to have someone who is independent and not someone you have to baby sit all the time.

Being independent is a healthy trait. Endeavor to have a name to yourself. It gives honor and prestige.

Don’t always say yes to their request.

They are too busy to make out time for you. Each time you call, they decline your call with a promise to ring back later which never happens.

Every request to visit is always accompanied with excuses, but once they are bored, they will seek for your attention, expecting you to leave whatever you’re doing to acknowledge it.

If they find out that you always oblige to their call, they will begin to loose respect for you, not because you’re doing anything wrong, but because you massage their EGO so much, when they were expecting you to return the same energy you give them.

To them, it feels like you have no worth, it feels like you don’t have much to do with your time .

Learn to say no to their request, let them work hard to get your attention. Even if you have much time at your disposal, don’t give them that impression.

When you’re not busy, pretend to be. That’s the best way to tame their narcissistic behavior. That will also make them realize your worth.

Don’t beg for attention or love.

It is often said that the heart knows where it belongs. This is one of the reason Why you must stop begging for attention in a Relationship .

When you plead to be loved, you’re indirectly telling them that you don’t deserve to be loved. Things you deserve, are those things that you don’t need to struggle for. You deserve them because you merited them. And one of such thing is Love.

Don’t dwell so much on your weak point.

When you emphasize so much about your weak point, you’re making people see less of you and they will certainly judge you with that, not withstanding your strength and whatever potentials you have.

Weak point is a common trait in human life, don’t take it as a personal challenge, be confident about yourself at all times, only that will make other recognize your worth.

15 signs he likes you but hides it

Signs that he likes you but hides it
Signs that he likes you but hides it

He likes you but hides it .could that be possible? A lot of women are curious to get an answer to this question especially when they are in love with someone but uncertain if they feel the same way.

Nothing hurts like being in love with someone who doesn’t feel the same way, and worse still giving yourself a false hope that they feel the same, only to discover that they don’t.

That’s why a lot of women may have the desire to express their emotions, but scared of what the outcome will be. Some others would rather throw green lights to avoid appearing desperate in case reverse was the case.

Nevertheless, do you know that is possible that a man likes you but hides it every now and then? You may want to know why he needs to hide his feeling for you, rather than express it? What’s so difficult in telling you how he feels? After all, he’s a man, and men are meant to be hunters when it comes to dating and relationship.

However, With the Emotional differences In men and women. You will understand why men conceals their emotion a times even if they are so much into you.

why men hides their feelings.

men are logical beings –

men are known to be logical than their female counterpart. They are often not derived by emotions, before a man opens up his heart to admit any feeling, he must have thought about it thoroughly, to be sure it’s truly love, lust or infatuation.

Though, a couple of men are always quick to express their emotions, but most a times, they are those ones who just want fling.

Men who need serious commit, are careful before making their choice. That’s why when they say yes, they mean it and when they say no, they equally mean it.

In other words, he hides his feeling most times because he wants to be certain you’re the one before committing his heart.

He likes you but hides it
Signs that he likes you but hides it

To retain their Ego

Generally, men are Egoistic by nature and wouldn’t want to loose it for any reason.

That’s why they tend to be secretive and likes handling things alone even when they are passing through challenges.

Same is applicable, when it comes to relationship. Aside players, most men are afraid to have their EGO tampered when they ask out and you turn them down, they are scared of rejection.

He’s an introvert –

In spite of the Emotional make up of a man, there are still men who are not vocal especially in expressing their feelings to the opposite sex.

They are shy and find it difficult to open up, even when they try to summon courage, they may end up stammering, not knowing the right word to say.

A man can still like but fall in this category, especially if he’s exhibiting other signs indicating that he might be in love with you.

To be in control of their Emotions.

Men love to be in control of their Emotions, As a stronger vessel, meant to protect, they detest any situation that may jeopardize their emotional stability.

Though, a handful of them are naturally too emotional and may have experienced severe heart break in the past, thus making them to put their emotions at check.

Now, if you’re wondering whether or not he feels the same way as you feel. Here are some signs to satisfy your curiosity.

15 signs that he likes you but hides it.

Constant communication –

You have friends and relatives who calls you a times right? how often do they call you? Do they call out of the blues? Or only when they need your assistance? Often times, later is the case.

Most times, we  receive calls from friends only when there’s an important thing to discuss or assistance they need from you.

When you have someone of the opposite gender who calls you often just to say “hi” even when they have nothing serious to discuss with you, There’s every tendency that they are in love with you.

Men are so pre occupied with their job and responsibility, that the last thing that would be in their mind is to check up on a friend, they only make out time out of their busy schedules to communicate with someone who means a lot to them.

It doesn’t matter if he’s mute whenever you pick up his phone, as long as he craves to dial your number every now and then or chat you regularly, he sincerely you, even if he hasn’t declared his feelings yet.

Indicating interest in your matters-

If a man is curious to know about every details in your life, ranging from your career, hobbies, and ambitions, there’s every tendency that he likes you likes you but hides it.

He doesn’t just ask you about it, but follows it up occasionally, and ensures that you’re committed towards accomplishing it.

The fact is that we are all overwhelmed with our busy schedules that we tend to forget about what goes on in other people’s life including our close pals and relatives.

If he still remembers every details about any discussion you once had with him, there’s every tendency that he likes you.

Men might be overwhelmed with work but hardly forget things they tag important to them.

change in his body language when he’s around you.

One of the significant signs that he likes you but hides it, is the change in his body language whenever he’s around you.

No matter how he tends to pretend, his body language will often reveal his true feelings. Have you ever caught him staring at you? But looks away immediately as soon as your eyes locks up with his. This is a significant sign. It’s more like a reflex action we can’t get hold of when in love.

Commitment

Another significant factor that shows that he likes you but hides it, is his level of commitment. You can’t erase the fact that some men are naturally generous, they can do a lot of things for a friend of the opposite sex without any strings attached.

However, there are limitations to this. There are some commitment that indicates he likes you more than a friend, examples of such commitment are investing their resources in your career, education, and dreams.

Men may be generous enough to assist you financially without any strings attached, but rarely invest when they are not emotionally attached to you.

That’s why most men will ensure that the feeling is mutual before making certain commitment.

If he takes such risk of investing even without asking you out, this is a great sign to take note of. People mostly invest where they are sure of returns.

Always showing up at places you will likely be .

He likes you but hides it, if you always bump at each other. Seeing him at certain places could be a coincidence though, but if this happens frequently. There’s a high probability that it is not just a coincidence, but an intentional act.

Always calling at odd hours.

Its quite normal for friends to often check up on each other, but most times, they call at leisure times, except there’s emergency.

If you have someone particularly calling you late at night, and as soon as you wake up just to hear your voice and greet you,

This is a significant sign that he likes you but hides it. Calling at odd hours is an intrusion of privacy,and only people who occupies a special place in your heart will likely intrude that privacy regardless of how you may feel.

Remembering your special dates and Anniversary.

Men are not too good in keeping dates. With the huge responsibilities surrounding them, they are bound to forget a lot.

However, if you have this male friend who always remembers your birthday, or never forgets to send you wishes and appreciation on special day like valentine day.

There’s is a great possibility that what they feel is beyond friendship. Wishing happy birthday might be a normal friendly gesture, but being the first to wish that, especially if it’s been long you told them about it, really means a lot.

Blowing hot and cold

He likes you, but hides it , if he always blows hot and cold. I know this one might sound odd! But this is true. The reason why he blows hot and cold is that he isn’t too sure that you feel the same way. He may feel the urge to express his feelings, and at the same time, try to hold grip of it, to avoid appearing too desperate.

Such Inconsistency may not be intentional, but occurs on realizing that he needs to slow down especially if he has rushed things at first. The major reason why he gets cold after he might have given you green lights is to ensure that he doesn’t scare you off out of desperation.

He’s just building an immunity around his ego. So as not to blow things out of proportion.

if he likes you but hides it. What should you do about it?

How best should you handle your feelings?

Don’t read too much meaning to his actions .

With the listed signs, it is obvious that he likes you but hides it, but the best way to handle things is to avoid reading too much meaning to his attitudes.

Remember they are just signs, you are not too certain about it. It could be a friendly gesture, try as much as possible not to hope so much to avoid disappointments.

Allow him take the lead –

Should i tell him how i feel?

Don’t do that yet! Men love to be in charge because they are naturally hunters.

If he likes you but hides it, you have to wait patiently till he opens up. No matter the green light he gives you, you stand the possibility of ruining your chances of being with him, if you appear desperate with your feelings.

 

Return his friendly gestures  I  know you might wanna beat him to his game by playing games or doing things that could push him away, so he could be scared of loosing you, and then open up to you.

In as much as that might sound like a good idea, but its too risky.

Remember that one of his reasons for hiding his feelings for you as earlier mentioned is because he is scared that the feelings might not be mutual.

Doing things that would push him away could make him loose interest. Don’t chase, or declare your feelings, but return his gestures. If he calls often, reciprocate his calls too. If he ask to see you, accept, if you’re free. Act confidently, but don’t over do things. Keep it at moderate levels.

10 ways to loose feelings for an abusive partner

Loose feelings for an abusive partner
How to Loose feelings for an abusive partner

To loose feelings for an abusive partner, you first have to know the implications of being in Abusive relationship. and how it can mess up with your mental health.

Abusive relationship doesn’t necessarily need to involve violence. It can come in various forms such as, emotional unavailability, disrespect and verbal abuse. Such can pose a threat to one’s sanity.

People in abusive relationship are conscious of the fact that it is not healthy to be in one, but their greatest challenge is ” how to loose feelings” and stop loving the one whom they are not supposed to love.

A lot have tried to but All to no avail. The relationship is draining them emotionally, but the feelings is be clouding their sense of reasoning, today, they resolved to break up with their partner, tomorrow, they are all over them again pleading for attention, pleading to be loved and cared for.

Even when they summoned courage to break up, they are still threatened with the feelings for their ex, especially when they come across anything that reminds them of the memories with their Ex.

Such is normal, we’ve all gone through that stage, but at the end, we’ve come to realize that Love is not just enough, especially when it is one sided.

But the big question is How can can one keep love aside, when the relationship is becoming too toxic? How can you loose feelings for an abusive partner? Below are some practical ways to achieve this.

10 ways to loose feelings for an abusive partner.

Focus on their weak point –

When you truly love someone, it’s pretty difficult to focus on their weak point, it’s pretty difficult to see their faults.

All you fantasize is about having a happy ending with them, hence everything they does seems so perfect to you. It only takes a great deal of discipline to admit the fact that the relationship is toxic. Write down the qualities you’ve ever desired in a partner?

Now ask yourself,how many of these qualities do they possess? Compare and contrast the number of times they’ve made you happy/ cry? How many of your goals have you achieved since you started dating them.

Focusing your minds on all these negative aspects rather than the momentarily memories you had with them as that will help you gradually loose whatever you feel for them.

Reassure your self that you deserve better.

Most times,we loose our relevance and self esteem in the bid to preserve a toxic relationship. in other to regain our worth back, you have to see yourself as a priority.

The only way to recognize and value true love is to love yourself first. When the self love is absent, you will definitely have to accept any crumbs being thrown to you in the name of love, because you’re unaware of what true love feels like.

Love is beyond emotions. It has to be practical, and can be easily identified when your sanity isn’t threatened.

Reduce your expectations.

To loose feelings for an abusive partner, you have to expect less from them. Don’t ever hope or wait for changes or imagine that they will suddenly start showering you with the kind of love and attention you’ve always yearned for.

People with narcissistic behaviors hardly change, you either walk away from them or learn to adapt with their behavior. Over expectations will get you stuck with them forever.

Live an independent lifestyle.

It is disheartening to know that most people are enduring domestic violence, emotional abuse and molestation in their relationship/ marriage because they depend solely on their partner. Such dependency often leads to humiliation.

When an abusive partner realizes that you live at the expense of their benefits, they will keep showering you a lot of that, as long as you will keep putting up with their domineering attitudes. In other words, you’re massaging their EGO, as they will keep treating you like a piece of trash.

Being independent comes with a lots of benefits. One of such benefits is being bold enough to walk out from abusive relationship or marriage without considering what you might be loosing.

It’s really a nice decision having your own source of income, building and planning your own source of wealth so you could have something to fall back to whenever life challenges hit you.

Stop making excuses for their behavior.

If you keep making excuses for your partner, you will find it difficult to loose feelings in an abusive relationship.

Feelings can be deceptive, it gives you the impression that you contribute partly towards their toxicity, it makes you believe that you can fix them or whatever mess they created, all because you don’t want to loose them.

Feelings aren’t a magical object that can appear and disappear at any moment. But when you admit the fact that they are the problem and not you, and until they fix it, it can never work, you will tend to loose feelings gradually.

Setting your standards and boundaries.

The level of standard you set for yourself will determine the level of respect or disrespect people will accord you.

People will treat you exactly the way you want to be treated. if you set a standard of things you can’t tolerate, you’re placing yourself on a worth, and the one who truly deserves you will do all they can to adhere to it.

Setting these standard will increase your value and diminish any wanted feelings in opposition to it. Only then you will realize that your worth is more relevant to any emotional feeling associated with toxicity.

Setting boundaries helps to avoid emotional abuse that often comes from over familiarity.

When you yearn for attention a times and they deny you of that, sometimes it could be as a result of your neediness. When you set boundaries, you clearly give them space to decide if they actually wants to be with you.

Stop taking the lead.

If you want to loose feeling for an abusive partner, stop initiating every thing to spice up the relationship. It makes you yearn for more, and when you don’t get that, you will feel devastated.

Don’t try to validate your feelings for an abusive partner. They already know what to do to rekindle the spark in the relationship, but they ain’t doing it because they have no intentions to.

I know this is one of the most difficult steps to avoid, because when you love someone you just want to go extra miles to proof it.

However, not having the same energy you give returned back should be enough to inspire you to move on.

Learn to give up –

This is another hard part, but very necessary if it can be mastered, there’s no point holding on to what is not working.

Learn to give up to save your sanity. Just like break up, it will definitely be hurtful, but learning to give up begins from admitting the fact the relationship is not healthy for you. Stop giving yourself false hopes that they will change, adults hardly change except by self decision.

When you admit that the relationship is not healthy for you, the decision to move on will follow suit, it will be difficult at first, but not totally impossible.

Loose feelings for an abusive partner
How to loose feelings for an abusive partner

Distance yourself –

To loose feelings for an abusive partner, you have to distance yourself from them.

Perhaps you’ve done everything listed here, but none is productive, I think it’s high time you distance yourself, if you’re really determined to loose feelings from an abusive partner. It’s time to distance yourself from them. If you’ve been cohabiting with them, it’s high time you pack your belongings.

Stop every communication, if you’ve to blacklist them, that will be a nice decision, this will enable you gradually get rid of them in your memory as out of sight is out of mind.

Avoid rebound relationship

Why rebound Relationship may seem like the best option, it doesn’t contribute to any positive effect if you intend to loose feelings for an abusive partner .

Rebound doesn’t stop your previous feelings for someone, it only subsides it, and gives you a false impression that you’re okay without them.

But when their memory surfaces from any source, you will get entangled again. The best is to get rid of the feelings naturally by applying some of the methods that was listed above.

To stop loving your abuser, you need to build your self confidence.

10 ways to identify a situationship .

 

 

 

How to identify a situationship
10 ways to identify a situationship

identify a situationship, you first have to find out what it actually means?

What is a situationship?

Situation ship is a type of relationship that often lacks commitment.

In other words, it is undefined and haven’t been made official yet. Most times, it can equally be referred to as friends with benefits.

Which actually implies that you’re dating each other particularly for the benefits involved and not solely for the feelings you shared. Even though one of the parties involved might be ignorant about this.

Unfortunately, a lot of folks are in this kind of relationship without being aware. They invest a lot, and anticipate for commitment, they exhibit so many characters showing that they’re emotionally deprived.

Characters such as nagging, desperation, yet it seems like the more they nag, the more it became worse, because the other party has an ulterior motive.

Situationship as the name implies often emerges from a situation. Something must have triggered the feelings. It could come as a result of infatuation, or a fling. In which one party may begin to catch feelings.

In other ways, both might decide to keep the relationship going, but along the line,one party may be emotionally affected, especially if he or she wants some thing serious.

Situationship has emotionally broken a lot of people, who never knew they were in one. This is why it’s necessary to define whatever ship you have with someone to avoid over expectations or disappointments. So how can one identity a situationship?

How to identify a situationship.

It happens spontaneously –

To identify a situationship, check the pace at which it occurred , if the feelings occurred so fast, often without trying to know much about each other, there’s is a high probability that it is situationship.

People fall in love more often when they find their spec in a partner in another.

Most times love happens as a result of seeing a quality you desire and going for them to ensure there’s is compatibility in marriage.

But that is a different case when it comes to situationship, whereby people come together as a result of their lustful feelings.

 

situationship does not care about marital or relationship status.

Have you ever been with someone or about to start something with someone and they make it known to you that they are currently with someone else, but that can’t ignore whatever they have with you or about to start with you. That is a perfect way to identify a situationship.

People in a situationship don’t care about the future, they are only interested in suiting their emotions at the moment.

The future is never their priority. Such people are willing to cheat on their partner, just to be with you for the moment, but will definitely not have any thing to do with you in the future.

If you’re looking forward for a relationship with future, it’s best to take to your heels when your supposed partner opens up to you about their relationship or marriage, but assures you that they are always for you. Don’t ever fall for such .

No one can love two people at a time. Is either one is love and the other is infatuation. Don’t make yourself vulnerable to deceit.

situationship may come as a result of pity.

There are some scenarios whereby someone may decide to be in a relationship with another not necessarily because there’s feelings, but because they don’t want to disappoint him or her,because of the sacrifices they might have made for them in the past.

Such relationship can be termed as situationship because there’s no true feelings involved. It is all about pity.

No matter the sacrifices or investment you’ve made in someone’s life, don’t accept to be loved out of pity.

If they’ve made their intentions known to you that they are not interested, kindly respect their wish. Refuse to be loved out of pity.

 

situationship comes with certain restrictions.

When you’re in a relationship with someone who’s seriously committed somewhere else, you will find out they will place a certain restrictions over the union.

You can’t visit them at certain places especially if their serious lover is around, you can’t call them at odd hours, you can’t visit unannounced, you can’t go to certain places with them.

If someone claims to love you so much, but they place certain restrictions over the relationship, there’s a tendency that they are not in a real relationship with you.

For a relationship with serious commitment, certain things comes without struggles, such as constant communication, calling at odd hours and visiting each other in certain places.

situationship comes with inconsistent habit.

If you want to identify a situationship. Watch how consistent your partner is. Situationship are characterized by dealing with inconsistent partners.

They blow hot and cold every now and then, because they are seriously committed else where, hence they can’t give you the attention you crave for.

Inconsistency can be caused by several other factors and not just situationship, however, being certain of the status of your relationship can really help to identify if it is a situationship or not.

situationship does not often involve a meaningful conversation –

what you often discuss at any point of meeting is one of the easiest way to identify a situationship.

In situationship,most of the conversation are often erotic and vulgar. Even when you try to bring up any vital discussion such as career, they will try to divert the topic because they are not seriously committed.

Hence any discussion that has to do with the future will certainly be irrelevant to them. They are only interested in one thing and that is, intimacy.

situationship is time based.

When the relationship is stipulated to last only for a certain period of time, there’s every possibility that you’re in a situationship.

Such scenarios usually occurs when their serious dates are out of town, and they need someone to keep them company for the time being.

Be observant and cautious with people who only reaches out to you at their own convinience, but often unavailable when you need their attention.

situationship avoids publicity.

In situationship, they can’t introduce you to the important people in their life such as families and trusted friends.

They can only show you off to friends who are probably in the same game with them or who understands their game. But never to people they hold in high esteem to avoid interrogations.

Situationship doesn’t consider your opinion.

If you’re in a relationship where your opinion is not considered no matter how much you nag, there’s every possibility that you’re in a situationship.

Such kind of relationship are usually one sided relationship. Because the energy is non mutual. While one party is fully committed, the other is playing games.

Situation makes you needy and desperate

Another vital way to identify a situationship is through your constant pleas for attention. In situationship, unavailability is certain, you will have to plead for attention, your emotional needs are at stake, because they devote more of their time to their serious lover.

Sometimes, they will come up with lame excuses of being too busy. Making you more needy and desperate to get their attention, which often time is an illusion.

in situationship commitment is impossible –

Have you ever tried to define a relationship? But all to no avail. Each time you bring any question concerning the future of the relationship, they either ignore or try to divert the topic to another.

This is a clear indications that they aren’t interested in any future commitment. They may not inform you this directly because they wouldn’t want to loose the benefit they get from you. But their inability to commit clearly defines their intention.

situationship is not a real relationship, identify it on time to avoid future regrets.

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