Compatibility in relationships is one term that has been greatly misunderstood and misinterpreted by many.
At the mention of the word “compatible”our minds often goes with having similar resemblance, in relationships we often picture a scenario of two people who seems perfect for each other, possesing similar trait, hobby, likes and dislikes.
And then when reverse is the case, we say both are not compatible with each other.
An instance is this,Mr A is in relationship with miss B. The emotional feelings were mutual,however, both have a slight differences in their personalities and traits. While Mr A is temperemental and easily provoked, miss B hardly gets provoked. Mr A may be emotional and sensitive, while Mr B maybe emotionally strong.
Now it is so easier to assume that both would never make good couples as regards to the differences in their individual traits. Is easy to conclude they are not compatible with each other.
However, despite the assumed incompatibility and individual differences, there are still people keeping it strong with their relationships.
Have you observed that some couples are still living together in harmony despite their weak points?
This signifies that possesing similar traits, personalities and qualities is not a guarantee that two people are compatible in a relationship. And not possesing similar qualities or being perfect is not a guarantee that they are incompatible either. And one may ask what does compatiblity in relationship actually mean?
Compatibility in relationship is the process by which two individuals with different backgrounds, qualities, personalities and yet with mutual interest, feelings and emotional understanding . have come together, ignoring their flaws and imperfections, with the intention of accepting and loving each other, just the way they are.
Note the word “mutual understanding ” that means she knows he can be temperemental a times, but yet she is willing to accept him, condone him and understand his mood at all times without having to initiate conflits.
He knows she is sensitive, insecured and sturbon a times, yet he understands this and always willing to put up with this attitude. This is what compatibility In relationship actually entails. And not having similar attitudes but always having to deal with Unresolved issues and conflicts. I will explain other signs to identify compatibiliy in relationships.
Five signs of compatibility in relationship.
Mutual Trust
You can’t say two people are compatible with each other when their trust levels are quite different. One or both might be having some feelings of insecurity initially as a result of their past relationship. But as soon as the relationship begins and when assurance had been giving by his/her significant other. They are expected to start bulding their trust gradually. Just imagine being in love with someone you truly believe in and confide in. You feel secured around them. You hardly doubt them. But on the contrary, they question every move you make,hardly believe you. Even when you try so hard to convince them. Such experience could be traumatizing and doesn’t show any sign of compatibility in relationships.
Mutual interest.
You may not really have a similar goals and dreams, but there is willingness to support each other’s goals and dreams in life. I’ve come across a lot of marriages where conflicts began as soon as the wedding ceremony was over.and what was the bone of contention? Disagreements on a partner’s choice of career.
The husband assumes that his wife may not be able to manage both her career and family simultaneously. While the wife feels she can. In the course of their disagreement, the man may instruct her to quit the job against her wish. Being a career woman, she may object to it. resulting in an unending conflicts.
And sometimes may lead to divorce in some severe cases. That is, if the issue prolongs. But when there is compatibility, such wouldn’t be an issue.
Because while the woman is working towards managing both simultaneously. The man is willing to offer his support and encouragements because he shares the same interest with her.
Tolerance
One way to identify compatibility in relationship is when both couples possess the ability to contol their emotions at all time.
And that can only be achieved by tolerance. Remember what we said ealier when we began our explanation on what compatibility in relationship actually implies.
Is all about learning to condone one another’s imperfections you can’t talk about compatibility without mentioning Tolerance, because that is what will make your relationship soar higher and wax stronger.
If you can’t tolerate one another,,then that means you can’t live together in harmony. this is another way of saying that your relationship won’t lead to marriage, or may not work out if you eventually force yourself in.
Imagine dating someone whom you tolerate every now and then, whereas they get infuriated with you at any slightest provocation or gives you the Silent treatment.You will feel bad right? It shows that you a’int on the same page with them, because while you are willing to forgo, they are always ready to bear grudges.
Have similar understanding and reasoning.
You can only say you are compatible when your reasoning is similiar with that of your significant other. i have seen some marriages where the conflicts was on whose responsibility it is to perform a certain duty.
This kind of issue occurs usually because there is no understanding. One party may be displaying bossy attitude over the other, as a result of variation in age or academic qualification.
Such couples are yet to understand that a healthy relationship suports each other at all times, irrespective of the age differences or qualifications. Such relationship lacks compatibility because one or both reasons differently.
Excitement
Imagine having all the four qualities as mentioned above in your relationship.
There will always be a feeling of excitement when you are together. you don’t feel compelled, manipulated or forced into the relationship.
Because this is whom you understands, shares common interests with, trust and tolerates. Such feelings is awesome.
Now before you venture into any relationship. First ask your self thisAre we compatible ?
Have similar understanding and reasoning – This is the most essential one to be compatible in a relationship. Thanks for writing!
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