Being obsessed in a relationship is an unhealthy habit that most people interpret as love.
Love is such a beautiful thing, the experience of loving and being loved in return is one of the exciting adventures in life that we all crave for.
However, love can only be exciting if done in the right way, when done wrongly, it will turn to obsession which can be mentally draining.
so what is obsession?
The word obsession literally means having a particular thing consistently occupying your thoughts that you can’t imagine the existence of life without it.
In Relationship, Obsession can be defined as a form of Emotional attachment where an individual feels totally dependent on the other to satisfy their emotional need. Obsession can sometimes be possessive and manipulative. It is a selfish feeling.
Your feelings and every day activities seems to revolve around them that you can’t occupy your thoughts with other productive thing.
The statement my “world is incomplete without you is a Sign of obsession . Your world shouldn’t be incomplete for any reason as long as you still have breath and mentally sound. Such statement denote a great deal of dependency which is typically unhealthy.
People who are obsessed in a relationship often play the victim card, without knowing that they are being manipulative. They hardly get satisfied, always feeling neglected and demanding for more, and this could lead to decline of interest from their supposed partner. In other not to push your significant other away, it is good to identify these signs earlier and work effortlessly to get rid of it.
signs that you are obsessed in a relationship.
1. you’re too clingy.
There’s nothing wrong with seeking for attention in a relationship, however, it is important to know where to draw the line so you don’t contradict it with being clingy. When you’re obsessed you have this intense urge to be in your partner’s space 24/7. And when that isn’t granted, you will feel neglected and frustrated.
2. You feel empty when you don’t hear from them.
When your thoughts is always occupied by one individual, When you feel hopeless if you don’t hear from them, when you feel unproductive if they didn’t communicate with you. When you find yourself pausing your activities just because they haven’t called, when you can’t focus on your work or studies because you miss them. All These are typical sign of someone obsessive in a relationship.
While it is natural to feel a void when you miss your significant other, it is weird and abnormal to pause your life and activities because you miss them. Your whole life shouldn’t depend on an individual.
3. You feel frustrated when they don’t take or return your calls.
Two or three calls is okay, when you find yourself calling repeatedly and sending random text messages accusing them and expressing your rage, that is a typical sign of obsession. At that point, you’re beginning to create a false imaginary scene of them being with another or loosing interest ,hence the reason your calls goes unanswered.
This is one bad effect of obsession. It affects your reasoning and stirs up only negative thought, that the only thing you can think about is being cheated. What if they are so busy and not disposed to take calls at that moment? Have you ever thought about that too?
4. you often cancel your plans and schedules to make up for theirs.
You’re obsession in a relationship if you lack the power of self will, canceling your appointment or schedules just because your partner wants to hang out with you is a sign of emotional weakness which is synonyms to obsession. Putting others first at the detriment of your happiness isn’t a healthy habit. You should be a priority, and not an option that can easily be manipulated.
5. You’re too possessive and insecure.
Being possessive and insecure is one of the typical signs of someone obsessed in a relationship. jealousy in a relationship can be healthy a times,
however, it becomes abnormal when you can’t deal with your partner’s social life without having to keep taps on them or monitor there whereabouts. Always forcing yourself into their space, being curios to know who they hanged out, checking their call logs are all signs of obsession.
Negative effects of obsession.
It makes you vulnerable.
Being obsessed in a relationship can make you vulnerable to hurts and emotional trauma. While fighting so hard to be with them, they may start taking you for granted, when the love is one sided, they will take advantage of your weakness. You”ll find out that the more you pursue them, the farther they pull away.
You will loose your confidence and self worth.
Having your happiness revolve around another is the easiest way to loose confidence in yourself. You will find it difficult making decisions that will affect you positively, because you no longer believe in yourself. You will be easily manipulated. You may end up going against your principle in the bid to make satisfy someone who may not see you as their priority.
4.it makes you toxic.
People who are obsessed in a relationship often show sign of toxicity and narcissistic behavior Their constant quest for love and attention can damage their emotional psyche overtime if not granted.thus leading to violent behaviors. They just want to be with their partner at all cost.
That’s why you often hear words like “it is either I have you or no one else would”. If you leave me, I will hurt myself.
These are not just mere words. Being dependent on others for your emotional needs can make these statements a reality. So how can you get rid of obsession?
Being obsessed in a relationship. Four ways to get rid of it.
1. Learn to detach yourself.
The first step in getting rid of obsession is to master the act of practicing Emotional detachment. Love is a beautiful feelings, and expressing it is equally normal. However, having a sense of entitlement to this feelings to the point of making your partner uncomfortable around you is unhealthy.
Hence the need to detach when you’re beginning to demand more than necessary.
The best way to detach yourself is to discipline your emotions. Stop texting or reaching out too often. Stop stalking them unnecessarily or visiting unannounced. Don’t call more than twice or text excessively..
Always return the same energy you’re given. With time, you”ll definitely get used to the distance as the body tends to adapt to a routine practiced overtime.
2. Build an emotional wall around you.
Building an emotional wall around you entails disciplining the mind to stop worrying over petty things like not taking your calls immediately, being unnecessarily paranoid seeing them with others, being clingy and over protective.
3. Get busy.
Often times, being obsessed in a relationship can be as a result of having a lot of time at one’s disposal. An idle mind can easily pave way for idle and petty thoughts. When you have a lot of project or work to accomplish, you will barely have time to stalk on people or demand for 24/7 attention. Get busy, give no room to idle thoughts.
4.self development.
The importance of self development cannot be over emphasized. It helps to boost ones self esteem and build their self confidence. When you focus more on trying out a new hobby, skills or career, you get addicted to self, and the positive effect that comes with it is that you will never place others above yourself.
