Is it necessary to feel jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex? Do I need to worry my self about loosing my relationship if my partner has lot of male or female friends. Does friendship with the opposite sex often ruin a relationship?
These are one of the common questions a lot of people ask on regular basis. The fear of loosing a loved one to another is very common, especially in a relationship that has been defined. It’s normal to feel paranoid when your partner is beginning to get too close to a member of the opposite sex.
However, some of these fears are often triggered by negative imaginations arising as a result of insecurities .
jealousy in relationship could be a sign of love, it is normal to be scared of loosing someone you truly love. It’s normal to occasional have that phobia that your relationship might end especially when you observe that your partner is beginning to get unnecessarily close to someone of the opposite sex. However, these fear becomes abnormal when it goes too extreme.
A lot of people have ruined their relationship because they keep assuming things which is not in existence, their instincts makes them believe that their partner’s colleague might be their secret lover.
They kept on suspecting and suspecting till they drove their partner away as a result of their insecurities.
So should I feel jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex? The answer to this question first depends on knowing who you are dating? Their life styles, and how they relate with the opposite sex.
Dating doesn’t mean you ain’t gonna relate with others who might have something valuable to offer. But it all depends on how close this relationship is, and the boundaries they set in other not to ruin their relationship.
Some jealousy in relationships are normal, while some are unhealthy. You first have to know what triggers your jealousy in other to find out if they are normal or not.
You will know that jealousy is unhealthy, when you haven’t gotten any proof that shows that your partner might be cheating on you. You’re just being afraid of the unknown.
why do I feel jealous over my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex?
1. Inferiority complex-
inferiority complex has a great negative toll when it comes to relationship. People who don’t have confidence in themselves would always see everyone around their partner as a rival.
Every action to them is being interpreted as infidelity. Sometimes, the problem could be you. To answer the question. Why do I always feel jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex, you need to work on your self esteem.
2.lack of emotional stability.
People who lack emotional stability often times develop phobias over the authenticity of their loved life. The fear of being dumped or jilted often surface every now and then. This fear is being triggered by their past experiences, hence they find it difficult to move on.
3. lack of trust.
Why do I feel jealous by my partner’s friendship? Sometimes this jealousy is as a result of lack of trust. Trust is a very essential factor in a healthy relationship.
Lack of trust creates room for unnecessary suspicion and fear. Trust is one of the criteria that determines the longevity of a relationship. And trust is earned. If you’re in a relationship where you find it difficult to trust your partner. There’s every tendency that such relationship will never last.
So what? Should I feel jealous by my partner’s friendship? Having known what triggers this fear, the next is to find out if this fear is really worth it. Or you’re just getting unnecessarily paranoid which is unhealthy for your relationship and cause your significant other to start loosing interest in the relationship.
And that leads us to the next article when should your partner’s friendship with the opposite sex be a source of concern to you.
when should I be bothered by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex?
1. if they have become secretive.
If your relationship have been a transparent one right from the onset, and then all of a sudden, they began to exhibit some signs secrecy, hiding things every now and then, including their mobile phones, then there’s a course for alarm especially when there is an opposite sex figure in the picture. If they have no strings attached, I don’t think it will be necessary hiding anything from you.
2. Deleting Text messages and chats.
When should I feel jealous by my partner’s friendship with the opposite sex? When you discover their usual habit of wiping off text messages and chats. You may not have caught them being intimate. But deleting of messages indicates they have skeleton on their cupboard and that could be termed as Emotional cheating.
3. loosing focus and attention from you.
Have you been seeing your partner with someone lately whom they claim they are just friends with, but then your relationship is no longer the same, they hardly pay attention to you during conversation, they seems lost that you have to call their names repeatedly in other to call their attention back.
There’s every tendency that they have something going on with that person.
Hence always being accept minded whenever you’re together. Except you’re certain that they are really bothered with a challenge ranging from their business or work place.
4. Not setting boundaries .
Having a friendship of the opposite sex is not entirely bad, after all we need each other’s influence to succeed By building strong connections every now and then.
Some people are really good in maintaining a strong circle that consists of both male and female gender. They may have tons of female friends. However, this female friends shouldn’t take the place of their partner if they happen to be in a committed relationship .
There should be boundaries on the kind of friendship and closeness your partner have with others. Entertaining all form of intimacy in the guise of friendship is deceptive. Being with a close friend in secluded places can stir up emotions by one or both of them.
What should you do if your observations are true?
The mistake a lot of people tend to make at this point is approaching the situation in a wrong way, which could drive them further away. So what’s the best way to approach it.
1. Communication .
Nagging may seem like the best way to handle the situation, but that could only alleviate it. Confront them, not in an aggressive manner, but in a mutual way. Give them a benefit of doubt and a listening ear to explain their own part.
2. Leave the relationship.
There’s no point sticking around where you’re not valued. If you’ve done all you can, yet nothing seems to have changed. It may be the best time to quit. Anyone who loves you would respect you at all times and won’t put you in a rivalry position.
