There are several reasons why you should avoid a third party interference in your relationship or marriage . .
one of the greatest attribute of a successful relationship or marriage is the ability of both couples to settle issues amicably without involving a third party. Third party itself ain’t totally wrong. There are times when issues becomes complicated and lingers on. At such times, both couples usually finds it difficult to admit their flaws as a result of Ego. They could resort to calling the attention of a third party. However, that should be the last resort. When all their attempts to resolve it has failed.
three reasons why you need to avoid third party interference.
No relationship/marriage is perfect
is quite normal to think that you are the only one having crisis in your relationship/marriage. Is normal to assume that your marriage has the worst and irreconcilable difference and misunderstanding. But reverse is the case. Every relationship/marriage has its up’s and down. Almost every couple has one time or the other experience that moment when they would argue over everything and rain abuses on each other over trival issues. But what gives you an edge over others is your ability to settle your issues within. haven’t you heard of the proverb. “don’t wash your dirty linen in public”. This implies that involving a third party is really not the best way to resolve your marital differences.
not involving a third party increases the bond.
misunderstanding a times creates room for couples to have a better understanding of themselves especially when they are resolved within. An instance is this. Coming back from work, but unfortunately, you met the home in a disorderly manner. out of anger and bitterness, you yelled and shouted at your wife without requesting to know why things turned up that way. She shouted back at you too. You both engaged in a heated argument for a while. Then went further to keep silent on each other.
Few minutes later, she opened up to you, telling you she was sick and that’s why she couldn’t do the chores. You understood and apologize for being harsh and not given her time to explain.
From this scenario, did you observe anything? You’ve initated that room for understanding each other more. Next time, you wouldn’t have to yell at her without giving her a listening ear. With that single attitude, you’ve created a bond and she will ever respect you for that. The scenario is totally different from when you attract the attention of outsiders.
The issue may not be resolved but instead may Worsen because your wife will feel humiliated and insulted for not giving her chance to explain before calling the attention of others. With such, you may not really get to understand each other. Consistent and habitual misunderstanding may continue in your marriage/relationship.
third party interference disrupts peace.
involving a third party in your relationship is one of the easiest way to create division between yourself and your partner. you maybe ignorantly revealing your marriage/relationship challenges to the wrong individual who out of their own selfish interest may advise you wrongly and this leading to separation.
Most broken home were a product of wrong advises from other people. not everyone is actually happy seeing your relationship/marriage become successful more than their’s. Some are really envious to see you two happy with each other. And so involving them is the easiest way to give them that opportunity to create coarse between you both. and so Because you ain’t in anybody’s heart to know their minds and thought towards you,i would rather advise you to be careful on who you reveal your relationship issues with.
so what should you do then?
i know you might be probably pondering on what you are expected to do especially when all effort to resolve your issue proves abortive. the answer is simple.
look for a recognized and professional marriage counsellor around you. Is advisable to go with them so you both can analyze on the advises and suggestion issued .and have a mutual Agreement on which to ignore and which to be taken into consideration. you can also confide in a trusted friend especially the one he/she trusts so much.