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How to know when a relationship is over.

How to know when a relationship is over. 1
knowing when a relationship is over

One of the most challenging aspect of dating is knowing or detecting when a partner is no longer interested and wants to back off. Often times, a lot of folks especially male folks lacks the courage to confront their partners and break the sad news or the fear of not hurting him/her especially when they had done nothing wrong . Hence the exhibition of weird and usual attitudes which leaves them with a mixed signals. However, in other not to waste your time, effort and resources in a relationship that is no longer in existence. Here are some signs that he/she wants wants to back off.

 

The rate of communication declines

Communication is the bedrock of any relationship. Communication increases the bond and intimacy especially for a distance relationship where both partners hardly see each other. With communication, both partners can feel each other’s presence despite the distance. Check out the rate at which your partner communicates with you recently. Compare it with the rate at which it was when the relationship began. Now if there is a drastic reduction on the communication. Then there is chances that he/she wants out. Though there could be exception in few cases. For instance, what is the nature of his job? Is it so demanding that he/she hardly make out time to handle other social activities. Did he change to a new job recently and so finding it difficult to adjust to the new system. These are the questions to consider before jumping into conclusion.

 

 

 

 

If the answer is yes. Then you may have to relax and calm your nerves.and maybe give him some benefits of doubt but you ought to Pay close attention to his/her attitude at this period. Does he calls back as promised assuming he was busy when you called. Does he still picks up your call when he is less busy? Does he makes out time to visit you especially on weekends which are his free work days? If the answer to this is no?. Then you may need to have a rethink because in spite our busy Schedules. There is always room to make out time for our loved ones. I. e if we value the relationship and wants them to still be part our lives. .

He tries to avoid you.

When you begin to observe the rate at which your partner avoids seeing you, then there is every tendency that they may want out in the relationship. Even at your complaint of his nonchalant attitude. He still dodges having a discussion with you, because he knows that the most dreaded question as regards to the fate of the relationship will definitely pop up

he sees fault in everything you do.

You both have been doing great, you can’t remember doing any thing to upset him. Then then all of a sudden, he picks fault in whatever you do,

talks to you rudely and flares up at any slightest provocation. This is the most complaint laid by women. Their partner all of a sudden begins to see them as a “nag” whenever they talk about an issue that requires to be addressed and given adequate attention to.

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Relationship is like a game.

A illustration with a game.

Relationship is like a game. 2
It takes two mutual effort to keep a relationship.

Relationship is like a game, even before you venture in, you are optimistic that it will be successful. Though skeptical and uncertain of what fate holds for you at the end, but yet, You are still confident that it will work. Despite the unpredictable future, you are still hopeful that it will be successful. Unfortunately, at a point..you may see your self struggling to keep it going. Within you, you know the right thing to do is to walk away. But you belief you've come along way to give up so soon. The above scenario illustrates the views and perception most individuals have about relationship. Both scenarios are synonymous, but quite contradictory in some aspect. While game may require the effort of one individual, relationship requires a mutual effort of two individuals who truly understands the reason of being in one.

How it should be.

It should be a 50.50 effort. When you begin to make it as though your life is in total dependent of it, while your partner enjoys their stress free life. It is no longer relationship, but OBSESSION.. When you see you self doing all it takes to make it successful, while your partner contributes nothing in any aspect. Is called, DESPERATION. When you are ready walk the miles for them, when they can't move an inch for you, then is called EMOTIONAL INSTABILITY. Just free your self and allow love to find you. A successful relationship does not require much hardwork. It only entails being with the right partner who shares similar interest with you. One who is ready to sacrifice and give out his/her best. One who isn't in for any material benefits rather than love. and this can only be guaranteed by being with the right one.

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What do men want?

What do men want? 3
A man having a good time with a woman that truly understands him.

How do I please him? How do I get him feel the same way like I do or reciprocate my love? If you are pondering on this question, then I must confess, you ain’t alone on this. A lot of female folks out there feels the same way. And had been constantly asking the same rhetorically questions. All men are the same,, a friend of mine recently lamented after being jilted by her lover of 2years. My past relationships also ended in a similar way she complained bitterely . You love them, you are clingy, you doesn’t, you ain’t caring, “she continues amidst of tears. A lot women had gone through similar experience and probably wondering what it really takes to get a man reciprocate their love. First, I have to correct that impression that “all men are the same”. Even an identical twins that shares the same umbilical cord still have different individual trait, let alone individuals that ain’t bloodly related. Most a times, men are not really the issue, but understanding the nature of a man, and how it tends to differ from that of female folks.

Here are four basic things a man want from you

Men love adventures

while women are derived and controlled by their emotions. Men are derieved by their ability and what they can achieve. Men are goal gaters, their strength lies on their abilities and achievements. They don’t want to be seen as a failure, so they would everything possible to avoid that status quo. Have you ever observed that when a man is having hard Would become emotionally detached from his his relationship. He needs space- the way most women reacts to situations often differs from the male folks. For e. g when a woman is passing through pressures or hard times, she may need a should to lean on and someone to confide in probably her partner, relations or trusted friends. On the contrary, a man wants to handle his alone as a way to prove his masculinity. And boost his Ego, Thus he may want his space.it doesn’t imply he has lost interest in the relationship. And the worst thing to do at this period is to pressurize him.it will only drive him farther away. Is not about you, he needs time to concentrate and think. And trust me if he truly loves you, the relationship will be back to nolmacy when everything becomes OK. He needs support- nothing excites a man than having that assurance that he is dating a supportive woman. A woman who doesn’t nag him every now and then but a woman who would help him actualize his dream . A woman who isn’t self centredness but who puts his partner’s happiness into consideration before taken any decision. .

He needs respect

no matter how good or down to earth a man is, he needs a submissive and respectful woman. Men are egocentric in nature hence wants to feel that relevance and importance from their women. They hate nagging. Men detest nagging so much. They hate being nagged several times over a particular issue even though they might be guilty of that. You Would become emotionally detached from his his relationship.

He needs space

the way most women reacts to situations often differs from the male folks. For e. g when a woman is passing through pressures or hard times, she may need a should to lean on and someone to confide in probably her partner, relations or trusted friends. On the contrary, a man wants to handle his alone as a way to prove his masculinity. And boost his Ego, Thus he may want his space.it doesn’t imply he has lost interest in the relationship. And the worst thing to do at this period is to pressurize him.it will only drive him farther away. Is not about you, he needs time to concentrate and think. And trust me if he truly loves you, the relationship will be back to nolmacy when everything becomes OK.

He needs your support

nothing excites a man than having that assurance that he is dating a supportive woman. A woman who doesn’t nag him every now and then but a woman who would help him actualize his dream . A woman who isn’t self centredness but who puts his partner’s happiness into consideration before taken any decision. . He needs respect- no matter how good or down to earth a man is, he needs a submissive and respectful woman. Men are egocentric in nature hence wants to feel that relevance and importance from their women. They hate nagging. Men detest nagging so much. They hate being nagged several times over a particular issue even though they might be guilty of that. You You have to be diplomatic when laying a complaint to him. It might be an annoying attitude from him that you wants him to quit or something that he needs to improve on. The way you approach the issue would determine if he would give you an audience ignore you, or tag you a “nag”. Be polite about it. Address the issue in a polite but matured way. Don’t talk about it consistently. Give him time to remininsense over it as most times habits are difficult to quit.

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Marriage, a woman’s greatest weak point.

Marriage, a woman's greatest weak point. 4
Marriage, a woman’s greatest weak point.

I am very certain that if marriage was a laid ambush, a lot women would fall victim as a result of their desperation and irresistible quest to get married.

Marriage is a beautiful thing, it is a union approved by God and meant for two individuals who had already taken a decision to spend the rest of their lives together. Note the word ” two individuals”. This is to say that it is meant to be a mutual agreement and desire.

Don’t push it

You shouldn’t be the one reminding a man that he needs to settle down with you, you shouldn’t be the one making the move. You know your job as a woman. Is very simple. Be yourself, exhibit a good character, work on your attitude and the right man will show up. Just like an adage which says ” good market advertises itself. If peradventure it didn’t work out with him, then know it wasn’t meant to be in the first place. But the problem is that we approach this marriage thing in a wrong way. You pack your bags without an invitation and start assuming wify roles, hoping to get his attention. This was exactly the same issue I was arguing with a friend on that some days back. She said and I quote “most of my friends got married by going for what they want and fortunately achieved that. Smiles, unfortunately, so many have this kind of mindset. Listen sweet hearts, that your friend got married by throwing herself to a man doesn’t mean she was smart neither Does it imply it would certainly work out for you that exact way. The truth is that It was probably meant to be. You may not meet that kind of man, so the best resort is to be yourself. A man already knows whom he wants to get married to. Cook for him, wash for him, satisfy him with all the styles you can think of. You would never get his attention if he doesn’t want you.

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The True definition of oneness in marriage

The True definition of oneness in marriage 5

For Married/singles. Though not married, I’ve discovered that the only (1+1=1 ).language married couples especially men understands most is sex. And a man shall live his parents and cleave unto his wife and they shall become one. There wasn’t any specification or condition attached to the oness. Aside being legally married. So why do most men understands oneness only when the issue of sex pops up? What happens to oneness in understanding, tolerance and respect. Some men would treat their wives as crap, and disrespect them in public. When she denies him sex. Hell will let loose. And all of a sudden, he would remember they are one. And start calling up family meetings to know why his wife must deny him sex…… Is that so???? This category of men are the ones who would forcefully have sex with their wife without her consent. Then goes ahead to justify themselves as not being a rapist with the guise that her body belongs to him. What happens to respect? You care about the body alone, what about the heart that gives the body life and energy to perform? Dont you that whatever happens to the heart, would equally affect the body. If you let the heart pass through hurt, the body gets affected too.

Respect, love and understanding.

Respect, love and understanding is the primary definition of oneness in marriage. Oneness implies that you both are one regardless of the age qualification or gender. If you are always acting bossy on your wife, disregards her opinion and ignores her ideas. You are not one but two different individuals living together under one roof. When last did you get close to your wife? Chatted, discussed and played with her like your playmate, aside when you want sex. When last did you compliment your wife? apart from compliments on bed. Oneness should include every aspects of your marriage. Oneness includes living as best friends and not flat mates.

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How to win her heart.

How to win her heart. 6
Man displaying his affection to his woman.

There had been so many questions and deliberations as to the techniques to adopt in other to win over a woman’s heart. A lot of men believes that women are complicated and there is absolutely nothing to do in other to win their hearts or get their attention. But this is false. It all depends on your approach. The problem is that we priotrize money to everything. But there are simple things we Often neglect. These are things women take into considerations. They can be explained as follows.

Understand her emotional make up

This is the first step to be taken into consideration while trying to get her attention. But unfortunately, so many give up at this stage. With the perception that women are hard to please. However, you ought to understand that Women are emotional being, so fragile and sensitive to the core. No wonder they cry over little things and at any slightest provocation. that makes you wonder if they are crazy or have probably gone insane. No they haven’t It is just a natural trait. Which can easily tolerated be by understanding her emotional make up.

Understand her love language.

Women loves attention, they always crave for it especially from those that matters most to them. They are fragile and loves to be pampered. But unfortunately, a lot of men mistaken it as emotional weakness and clingyness . She wants a man who would always be there for her and protect her at all times. Women hate the word “busy”. She does not need a workalic,but one who is ready to spare at least some hours out of her busy schedules to be with her. It doesn’t imply You should abandon your duties. But it does mean you should spare at least some hours out to be in her company.

Pay attention to her

Listen to her .Women are like kids, they get so annoyed when they find out that you don’t give a damn of whatever they wanna say. During discussions, a woman wants your undivided attention. She is desperate for your audience. She wants you to listen, not really because she is making sense, but because she wants create an intimate bond with you. Laugh at her dry jokes. Contribute to her discussion, even if it ain’t interested. She wants to know that someone is excited to be in her company. It strengthens the communication between you both.

Be patient with her

Often times. they will display an annoying attitude, but you don’t have to flare up. It takes understanding and tolerance to handle a woman’s attitude and only a patient man can condone that. Women have a general nagging trait, they tend to complain a lot especially over irrelevant issues which you can ordinariry overlook as a man. It is not perculiar to your partner alone. But you don’t have to be rude to her. It is often said that behind every nagging woman, there is a man not doing what he ought to do. This statement ain’t a proved fact,, but is still possible though. Listen to what she always complain about. It may be what you need to improve on. Dont use abusive words on her. It can make her emotionally weak. But rather correct her in love. https://loveonet.com/2019/04/09/what-do-men-want/

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Reasons behind the high rate of divorce in marriage.

Misconception about dating.

The rate of divorce and marital disagreement had been on a rapid increase lately as a result of the wrong motive behind dating and courtship. So many people have the wrong views, notions and objectives to while they are in a relationship. Most believes that dating is a period of studying their partner and getting to know everything about them in order to get acquainted with them. While to others, dating is like a trial period. Where they get to know how compatible they are with their intending partner. There is absolutely nothing wrong with the aforementioned reason. As they all varies with individual’s perception and mindset about the term.

Real definition of dating

However, dating, in a general term goes beyond studying your partner or observing their flaws. Because no matter how long you try to study them, you may not get the full understanding about them. This is why so many marriages always crash as soon as the ceremony is over and the couple begins their life together. A partner may be trying to put up the best character to impress the other. Living in pretense just to buy his/ her partner’s love. While in reality, reverse might be the case. A Good definition of dating should be a period where couples who had already seen each other’s flaws and are willing to push it further learn to accept each other the way they are, help each other in improving on their weaknesses, correct each other in love…..admit each other’s weakness and working hard towards improving on them. In this scenario, the intending couples are transparent, they don’t leave a pretentious life. They always try to be themselves. Irrespective of what their partner thinks about them. In that way, they can truly detect their partners true feelings towards them.

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why you must seek for closure 1

why you must seek for closure 1 8
They are happy together because they sought for closure .

Seeking for closure is the first priority and concern for any individual who hopes for having a serious and committed relationship. Closure is like warranty, imagine buying a new mobile, vehicle or any other electronic gadjects without a warranty.

You are ignorant of its durability and quality. You don’t even know what to expect. In case it stops malfunctioning. There is no guarantee that is gonna last. The feelings is like a child kept in an isolated place with no clue as to when his/her mother would return.
Closure is very vital in any relationship. Its vitality can be enumerated thus.

Boosts your confidence

the assurance that your partner feels the same way would help to boost the confidence in you. And erase all forms of doubt concerning the relationship.

Makes you secured

most atimes, insecurity in relationship occurs as a result of uncertainty. There is so much doubt in you. You can’t ascertain the fate of the relationship because there was no closure from your partner. They kept you in the dark while going about their business. They don’t care about your feelings neither do they care if you are hurt because there was no form of closure.

You would know when to move on:


Seeking for closure enables you to determine the fate of the relationship so as to know if you are to continue or give up. so you wouldn’t continue wasting your time in an unproductive affair.

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Triggers commitment:

When there is assurance or certainty that a relationship would succeed or move Or move to the next level. It makes you become more committed. You will see the relationship more like a future union. Rather than a temporal strings. it gives you an assurance especially when there has been an effort to ensure that the relationship scales through. It would help activate your optimism. https://loveonet.com/2019/03/24/co-habitation-in-a-relationship/

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How to adopt the right attitude towards success.

Success is a choice, and not a wish!!!
Everyone wishes to be great in life, but only few has made that choice, taken that decision and ready to do whatever it takes to get there as long as it is genuine and legal.

Dreaming big is a path towards success, but working hard gets you that destination.

Set your plans

Before the owner of a building begins its foundation, he first commences by setting out his plans, his choice of design, and budget.

However, having the right choice of design, and plans won't make him accomplish his dreams of setting up a building . no matter how great his ambitions and dreams were.
They are not just sufficient enough. What makes the dreams becomes accomplished is the determination and effort towards getting it done.
If he doesn't have any plans of getting the income required, then his dreams becomes a waste.

Take Actions

The same scenario applies in life,
Dreams prepares you for your future, but your effort and hardwork takes you there.
Wishes gets you focused, but your effort in turning that wish to a reality makes it fulfilled.

A life with just a dream can easily be blown off when trials and tribulations sets in...but when accompanied with determination, persistence and hardworking, it stands firm and Unshakeable despite the stormy weather. Life is not a bed of roses, there are so many forces trying to pull you down, so many disruptions trying to get hold of you, so many circumstances trying to distract you. but you can only overcome by realizing the fact that you have the key towards your success. you have the right to determine what goes on in your life. no one can pull you down except you.

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How to get hold of your weakness. 1

a

How to get hold of your weakness. 1 9
girl rejoicing as she was able to keep her weak point kept at check

Why can’t I get hold of my weakness??
Why can’t I be in control over my life???
Why can’t I put a stop to this habit which has completely taken a toll over my life.

Things I never want to do or have vowed to put a stop to, I still find my self deliberately or in deliberately doing them.

These and many more are some questions and worries a lot of individual are battling so hard to answer.

Addiction is not just a habit, but a constant habit capable of enslaving an individual. It has sank deep into a lot if people’s system, making them vulnerable to all sort of unwanted habit and thus overpowering their emotions and self will.

However, just like every other weakness, Addiction could also be controlled and gotten rid of. if tackled with the right measures. And one of such measures isyou can’t possibly solve a problem without first accepting the fact that there is a problem. You first have to admit that you are addicted to a habit. It shows your willingness and readiness to put a stop to to it.

Discovering the root course :

as you have admitted your weakness, another step that will enable you put a stop to it is to look out for and pay keen attention to what constantly leads to it. It could be the place you normally visit, people you often visit, friends, books or movirles you watch and s lots more.

Discipline:

As you’ve discovered the root cause of your addiction. The next step is looking out for ways and factors that will enable you to stop it. And thus is where discipline plays a major role. Discipline is very important in all aspects of out of life. A lot of addictions sometimes could be associated with lack of discipline.

Discipline entails restricting or denying your self with some desires which might be pleasant to you but does not have any positive impact on your life. For instance,

If you are addicted to sex, you have to discipline your self enough by putting a restraint to movies you watch, books you read.

If you are addicted to Alcohol, you have to put a restraint to friends you keep, and places you visit.

Do not give up. It is quite possible.