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Overcoming your fears(yes you can). 4 steps to guide you

Overcoming your fears Is an article filled with life stories aimed at giving you insight and encouraging you to believe in your self , and believe you can make it by overcoming your fears.

Overcoming your fears(yes you can). 4 steps to guide you 1
Overcoming your fears

Fears!!! A set back.

During my school days as pupil, our teacher once gave us this assignment that looked so complicated and difficult. We all resolved not to attempt it since it almost looked impossible to get right. . I got home, dropped my school bags, had my bath, ate and dashed off to play with some friends in the neighbourhood. I never bothered myself going through the homework because I already presumed is beyond my capacity.

The next day, I got to school, and discovered that other pupil had the same thought with me. None attempted solving the math problem. So I relaxed my nerves.

Later, our teacher came and asked us to submit our home work. Without much worries, we all submitted the questions back as we wrote it. Few minutes later, she called one of us out, he came out. She asked him to solve the problem in the board for all of us to see. And to our greatest surprise, he began to teach us. After that, he was instructed to flog us one after the other for not attempting the home work. We felt embarrassed. We couldn't believe someone actually did what we thought was totally impossible.

A friend who studied architect once told me that when images were drawn by their lecturers. he would stare at the images and develop phobia for drawing. According to him, he usually plead with some fellow course mate to help him with the drawing. A times, he would have to pay before they would accept his request. Until one day, his father's usual quote kept echoing in his head.

Yes you can, he has no two heads, or hands. If he can do that, you can equally do that too. Ever since then, he took a decision never to plead with anyone to help him with the drawing. He tried it out himself for the first time, it wasn't all wonderful. But he was amazed with his strength. He never imagined he could even get to that extent, he continued improving gradually. the more he persisted, the more perfect he became.

Hope you were inspired?

I've come to discover that one of the greatest obstacle in life is fear? Fear of uncertainty. Fear due to inferiority complex, fear as a result of anxiety.

You want to give it a trial. But your instinct speaks otherwise. You want to make an attempt, but it feels like you gonna fail, you assume is not possible. Hence the conclusion, that you can't.

You keep staring at your dreams without any effort to make a move because your brain had been occupied with negativity, your instinct is filled with impossibility. overcoming your fears will help you conquer with all forms of challenges you may encounter in the journey of your life. Read similar article on

Overcoming your fears(yes you can). 4 steps to guide you 2
Yes you can

How to overcome fear and inferiority complex.

Are there people who had successful done what you are still afraid of doing? If yes, then believe you can as well. Yes you can.. It is possible.

All you need to do is to read about their success stories and how they began. Let their story serve as a source of inspiration to you.

Learn from their mistakes, make it an advantage to yours and a way of improving your knowledge to achieve better than they did. do not ignore the power of learning. we virtually learn everyday. never assume you've known it all. each day should emerge with unique knowledge. which guide your steps And expand your intellect.

also read.

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4 steps on How to overcome depression.

How to overcome depression is a post that was specifically written to assist people passing through depression and challenges beyond their control. In other to avoid unusual thoughts like suicide

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Depression is a state of mood change which could result to feelings of sadness, hurts and frustration.
.depression could arise as a result of so many factors ranging from work pressures, emotional trauma, relationship break ups,loss of job, chronic ailment, financial incapability, rejection from loved ones, marriage crisis. To mention but a few.. The feeling is better described than experienced. At one point, you feel like your world is begining to crumble, at other times, you feel like your existence is no longer vital. Research has it that depressed individuals are more vulnerable to suicidal thoughts and attempt if not encouraged because there is always this feelings of emptiness, broken heart and rejection . Hence the thought of suicide.

Are you going through depression right now? Do you feel like your world has crashed? Are you contemplating suicide? Then you ain’t alone in this. Millions of people all over the world are passing through same. A lot has gone through that stage and still came out strong.. Yes you can, but there are some factors to enable you overcome depression. .

Avoid isolation

The major problem with most people feeling depressed is that they isolate themselves from other people.

They are often stuck with loneliness, they feel no one cares, they feel no one would ever listen or understand their plight. Making them more frustrated. Avoid being alone in this period. Always be in the company of friends, go to seminars, workshops, attend religious programme, comic events, entertainment shows.

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You really don’t know how much that would contribute towards your healing process. It helps to get you distracted, interacting with others equally enables you to be strong as some other people would equally share their experiences, which Helps in boosting your confidence and strength. Just know that you ain’t alone.

Talk to someone

Do you have a trusted friend? relative or family member you could confide in? If yes, then you have to open up to them.

Don’t bottle up that feelings, don’t be shy to let it out. Let someone encourage you, let someone cheer up. The fact is that most suicidal attempt wouldn’t have been a reality if the victims had confided in someone.

Be mindful of what you read, view or listen to.

At this period, there are certain books you ought to avoid, some books or music which keeps reminding you of how pathetic your situation is, such as emotional books or music. Mystical books which often derive their source from fictious facts and tends to impose fear on its victims.

Avoid horror movies too.

What you need at this period is motivational books, motivational speech, inspiring stories from people who had passed through critical times similar as yours, but overcame and still made it against all odds. These are things to cheer and encourage you. and equally help you to overcome depression.

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surround yourself with positive minded people

Avoid associating with people who have negative thoughts, people who keep on reminiscing and lamenting on their past, people who always wish to be pitied after narrating their predicament.

All you need is people with positive mindset, people who don’t lament over their situation but rather seek for the way out.

find solace in God.

One of most important ways to overcome depression is by finding peace in God’s word. There are a lot of stories in the Bible that need to cheer us up and encourage. And one of such stories is the story of job. I’ve tried to analyze and compare some of the challenges that people usually face.

And I’ve come to discover that none was as severe as that of job. but despite his challenge, he didn’t give up on life, neither did he curse God. even when there was pressures from friends and family. at a point, he was all alone as everyone deserted and gave up on him including his own wife. that should be a source of motivation to you.

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3 ways to handle your job and relationship.

3 ways  to handle  your job and relationship. 6

How to handle your job and relationship is a post that summarizes some of the things couples ought to do in other to strike a balance betwee their job and relationship so as not to loose one or both.

And so you’ve gotten this dream job you’ve always anticipated for. You can’t get hold of the excitement. You are glad you finally made it. Your dreams had finally come to pass . But there seems to be a challenge. And i. e being able to balance your love life and work. Your partner had complained severally for lack of attention and neglect. They are beginning to suspect the tendency of you cheating on them as the reason behind your negligence. They have bugged you with several question concerning their fate in the relationship so as to quit and not to get heart broken in the long run.

Your lack of commitment is beginning to traumatize them emotionally. You are confused. You can’t afford to loose your job, you can’t afford to loose your relationship either as you’ve come a long way. Does that look like your experience ? I must commend you for being at the right place.

Having a demanding job is one of the challenges in maintaining a healthy relationship. You are not alone in this, as most individuals are also passing through this experience and skeptical on the best approach to use in handling their job and relationship. However, one thing we need to understand is that an average human is always busy with one activities or the other. No one is totally idle, as long as they could spare out time to shower, eat or move about.

Similarly, we don’t have to quit or give up in some important aspects of our life as a result of our busy schedules. You don’t have to quit your job or relationship, all you need to do is to strike a balance as Both are important . And here are possible ways to handle your job and relationship.

Spare out time to communicate

I am very certain that sparing out 2mins out of your busy schedules to reach out to your partner wouldn’t make you loose your job, or would it? Well I guess no!!!

Don’t wait to get an hour spare time, or till you get back home because Probably you will be tired after having a hectic day, and before you know what has happened, you’ve dozed off or it will skip your mind.

You don’t have to call, an instant message. “hello babe” how are you doing? just checking upon you has done the magic. What matters is that communication had taken place. . You that really know how excited they would be receiving such message, because it got to show you have their interest at heart. .

Make out time on weekends

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Is your job so demanding that you hardly make out time during the week? you can try weekends especially if your are free at such time. Most companies are usually off during weekends. A few others might not be off, but close earlier than they do during the week . You can make such time to be with them And catch up with days you were apart .

Be diplomatic

Don’t yell or fuss whenever she complains about your lack of attention and busy schedules on her. Don’t tag her attitude as “nagging”. It got to show she really cares. Because if she doesn’t, she wouldn’t give a damn weather you called, messaged or not.

Try to make her understand. She has every right to complain but explain things to her in low and lovely tone. Let her Understand your busy schedules doesn’t change your feelings towards her. With time, she will begin to adjust and start seeing things from your own perspective.

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The negative Effects of pornography in marriage

The negative Effects of pornography in marriage is a post that summarizes some of the misconception and negative effects of excessive viweing of pornographic materials as regards to marriage

Misconception about pornography

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Negative effects of pornography in marriage

There are so many misconceptions and believe about the word”pornography’. But the true fact is that it has done more harm than good in our society today especially as it relates to marriage. It is one of the marriage killer.Most times, couples tend to imitate the kind of sexual escapades being performed by this porn stars forgetting the fact that all those sexual explicit they watch are not real. These porn stars are just commercial sex workers who were paid to act in a specific manner, most times,these porn stars takes drugs which makes them act weird and receives violent sex in the pretense that they are really having fun…they are just after their money and nothing else.

It’s Negative effects

1)Brings about comparisons

Now, what I don’t really get why any sane man after watching pornography will expect her wife to be wild and perform exactly like the porn actress? And if she doesn’t meet up to the expectations, you will start hearing words like my wife is not romantic and good in bed and this may cause a great dispute between the couples or even lead to unfaithfulness by the man.

2)Makes you see her more like a sex object

Nothing beats like setting and putting your wife in the ”mood”, in such way, she wouldn’t act out of obligation. Teach her where she isn’t getting it right, apply a lot of foreplays before bouncing on her like a hungry lion looking for a prey to devour. Don’t subject her to physical abuse or emotional tortue, all in the name of having a great sex, she is your wife and not a cheap prostitute awaiting payment for a service rendered. Sex is meant to be enjoyed by couples and not endured. fore play and romance prior to love making increases the bond and intimacy in the marriage. It also helps to keep her in the mood. And makes the sex more pleasurable.

3)Makes you self centred.

Excessive porn viewing could make you think less of your spouse and more of your self alone. You would always want her to portray the moves and positions of the porn actress without considering the fact that she may not be comfortable with that. Is all about you and satisfying your sexual urge without considering her feelings.

4)Increases your chances of cheating.

In the bid to experience a certain sex escapades, your chances of cheating on your spouse may be high. There may be this urge to experience a new form of sexual escapades since your wife ain’t farmiliar with that. You will begin to see your wife as a boring and naive partner. Sex with her all of a sudden becomes too boring for you. Hence the urge to patronize a whore.

What you must do

Quit watching porn, it only gives you a wrong mindset and misconceptions on sex as it relates to marriage

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3 ways to handle Mixed signal from your crush

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How to handle mixed signals from your crush

How to handle mixed signal from your crush is a post that gives you a detailed explanation of the do's and don't's in other to increase the chances of having your crush make advances to you.

You can't help but fantasize about this dude. He is every guy's dream, he's cute, handsome and intelligent. He seem to possess all the qualities you desire in a man.

You wished he could notice you. then all of a sudden, your wishes came true. He began drawing closer to you. Yet you were still unsatisfied.

You want something more than friendship. The green lights were obvious, but yet he wouldn't make advances. Instead he gives you mixed signals, today you are both acting like a couple. Tomorrow, he makes it known to you that he doesn't want to loose your friendship. "friendship". You muttered to yourself .

The word "friendship" brings down your morale And ruins every optimizing in you. All you desire to hear from them is "I don't want to miss your love, I don't wish to miss your companionship. Friendship rather sounds formal. And you want something more intimate than that. Does that sound like your experience? No doubt, you might probably going through this right now. And trust me, the feelings hurts like hell. But am about to show you some few ways to handle that.

To handle mixed signal you have to be proud of yourself

Respect, dignity and value comes within. You can't command respect from others, when Is obvious you don't attach value to your life. Be proud of who you are. Stop displaying attitudes of inferiority complex.

Stop making them notice you, stop giving them green lights, stop bugging. Stop stalking them, stop bumping into their lives every now and then like a pest. People often take things which they can Easily get for granted.

Have you ever wondered why some commodities are valued than others. It all boils down to the prize, availability and quality. When you make your self easily available, people will definitely toil with your emotion.

Especially when they notice you are drooling over them. Trust me, if he really wants a relationship with you, he would definitely open up to you on seeing you ain't pestering him or acting needy around him.

To handle mixed signal Upgrade your life

Sometimes, one can become attracted to you via your life adventures, achievements and interesting life style. Give your life a a goal getter. Let your focus and attention not just be on relationship alone.

The truth is that he might not be having the urge to move your Friendship to the next level because he feels that there ain't anything inspiring thing about your life. You are just you, no plans for the future, no achievement, no goal.

Everybody wants to be with that special one who not only have an interesting life style but are always striving to become better each day. Be a dope soul that everyone craves for your attention.

In other to handle mixed signal, Don't settle for less

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There are men who wouldn't hesitate to use this kind of situation to their own advantage. Seeing how desperate you are to have them, they would turn you into a friend with benefit.

They will try to lure you with sex even when they have no intentions of dating you. Try as much as possible to avoid having sex with your crush no matter how Intense your feelings are to him.

Don't accept to be his friend with the hope of getting sexual satisfaction from him. Truth is that if he has no intention of dating you, having sex with him wouldn't change that either. It only make you look cheap and less attractive to him. Also read

To handle mixed signal you have to Disentangle yourself from him.

If you've waited for so long especially having applied all this rule, yet he still wouldn't make advances. I would advise you to respect his choice and move on. If you can't handle being friends with him, disentangle your self with him till you are over with the feelings.

You may also find this helpful.

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What women should know about submission

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Submissive Woman undergoing emotional abuse

What women should know about submission is a topic based on educating women both single and married about the true definition of being submissive and erasing the misconception about the term so as not to become vulnerable to emotional abuse.

Submission is a very crucial factor needed for a successful marriage, it's importance cannot be over emphasized. In a general concept, submission means to willing allow oneself to be controlled by someone/people. It could also mean being obedient to assigned rules. However, being submissive in marriage entails respect and humility. Women are thought to be submissive to their husband, as a sign of respect, humility and obedient. Performing their wife roles without being obligated or mandated to, not replying back to their hubby in a disrespectful manner. Which are all good, and a nice way to peacefully secure a home. However, there are still misconception and wrong interpretation by a lot of folks on the word "submission". Being submissive does not mean one should accommodate any form of ill treatment From their spouse. .

Three ways by which women ignorantly misinterpret the word "submission".

Accepting authoritative and bossy nature from their hubby

Being Submissive does not correlate with accepting being bossed around. even In the Bible, when Christ was giving admonishon on how a Godly home ought to be like. He urged women to be submissive to their husband. He went ahead to urge men to equally respect their wives and not to provoke them. This implies that for a marriage to be peaceful, all hands must be on the deck for both couples. Even as a submissive wife, she still deserves some respect and kind gesture from you. When your becomes too bossy, talks to you rudely and forcefully demands everything from you rather than request. It is a sign of disregard and emotional abuse. Do not keep mute with such treatment in the bid to be submissive. Call his attention towards it, speak out, but do that in a polite and respectful way. Talk to a marriage Counsellor

Entertaining domestic violence

Domestic violence is a crime against humanity. Unfortunately, a lot of women are going through domestic violence in their homes, Being dehumanized on daily basis, having bruises all over their body and secretly wallowing in pains. Yet have refused to speak out or quit such marriage because they were meant to believe that in so doing, they would be term as irresponsible wife. Such women ignorantly accept all manner of physical abuse and violence from their hubby in the name of being submissive. they end up being emotional demoralized. Do not entertain any form of abuse in the bid to be submissive. Report to the appropriate authority, seek for marriage counsel, involve his/your family members if he is unwilling to change. If quitting is your last resort. Please do well to quit. Not easy though, but better to be a divorcee than end up being murdered while trying to secure your home.

Entertaining infidelity from their spouse

A lot of women have lost their self esteem, while some others are at the verge of loosing it because they were meant to believe that being submissive means entertaining all form of attitude even at the expense of their happiness. You aware he cheats on you, yet kept mute because you afraid of confronting him for fear of being tagged as a bad wife. He brings another woman into your matrimonial home, chats with random women. Right Inside you are hurt, you are emotionally battered and distablized, yet you keep pretending like everything was fine. You can't talk, because your daily upkeep and monthly allowance would be seized. All I see here is inferiority complex. Submission does not mean you should be happy being treated like a trash. Am not advising you to engage him in a fight either, far from it. But when such occurrences begins to pop up, you need not to ignore. It had gone beyond being submissive. Call his attention towards it, let him know you ain't OK with his attitude. involve a third party if the need be, seek an advise from your marriage counsellor.

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Does online dating actually works?

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Does online dating actually works

Does online dating actually works, this is a question that raised so many controversies over the years. But let's find out .

Since the advent in technology, life had been made easier in various aspects, and dating seems to be one of the aspect.

Online dating is one of the effects and outcome of the recent growth in technology today . . It is no longer news that people get acquainted and connected to each other via social media. Some were fortunate to find their life partners, while others are still at the edge of finding their's. However, despite the prevalence rate of online dating.

A lot of people still doubt it's possibility and believes that such relationship is unhealthy. Now that brings us to the question, is does online date actually possible? There is absolutely nothing wrong with online dating. Meeting a potential date or spouse online, is nothing different with meeting them other places such as clubs or social events. However, it all depends on the approach used. below are several by which both can make it work. the question does online dating Arrange to meet each other.

arrange to meet each other .

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Does online dating actually works?

At the mention of online date, so many people begins to picture a scenario where by two folks accepts to be each other's friend on social media even without meeting each other. Then begins to chat each other to the point of exchanging contacts with each other. Then all of a sudden, they became fond of each other as one or both parties began to develop feelings for the other. When they couldn't hide the feelings anymore. They came up with the decision of starting up a relationship even without knowing what their intended Date actually looks like. But unfortunately, this is not what an online date entails. It is other wise termed a "a blind date" .

A date can only be significant when two two intending couples have met each other physically. Otherwise it is not qualified to be a date.

A lot of people got attracted to their online date by their physical attribute such as height, facial beauty and so on. Such people may end up getting disappointed when they discover that the picture displayed is quite different from the individual .

And so in other to avoid such scenario and to answer the question "does online dating Actually works? it is advisable to arrange a convenient time to meet each other, in other to be sure they are truly your idea man/woman.

Choose a convenient venue .

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Does online dating actually works

lot of people particulary women develops phobia whenever the issue of online dating comes up. As a reult of the bad experiences and misfortune some people went through in the course of meeting their online date. So many people had unknowingly fallen victims to rape, murder and ritual killings. . So in other no to be caught in such, is always advisable to apply caution. while dealing with an online date. Remember he/she is a stranger , you Choose a secured and open environment such as eartry, tourist centres and recreational parks . So as to feel secured. You may also like

Be Real

Remember this is your first date, you don't want to jeopardize or ruin your chances of winning their love . First impression they say matters a lot, the way you presents yourself speaks a about your personality. Do not fake a personality in the bid to get them accept your proposal. You maybe ruining your chances of being trusted in the future.

As trust is an essential factor and foundation of any successful relationship. Honesty is the key and one of the answer to the question "does online dating actually works?

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How do I improve my life?

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How do I improve my life?

Guess you've be wondering how you can improve your Life, then you are in the he right place. Read this.

And so you've finally started that business, skills, of your dream. After so much procrastination and deliberations And so the next stage is to begin to anticipate for a successful result as that is the dream of every entrepreneur. You've read the successful stories of various people who were into similar careers. It was their story that got you inspired to pursue your dreams. You hoped to achieve your own success. Inasmuch as that is the wish of everyone,but I would have to remain you that the journey may not be so smooth. You may encounter some challenges on your way. And if you ain't determined enough, it may lead to frustration which will can you make you quit or loose interest.
Let's look at some factors that might lead to frustration.


everybody wants to make it quick, everybody wants to be celebrated on popular social medias and renown sites. Everybody wants to drive that latest model, Cruise in that exquisite and well furnished apartment. But the question is, how many are willing to pay the price of success which includes being patient enough to watch it grow from the scratch? So many successful people started with little or zero capital, they were unrecognized for several years, despite their efforts and
commitments. Yet they kept pressing on and on, pushing harder amidst of pressures from friends and relatives who tried to discourage them to derail from their dreams because it ain'tyielding result.

Lack of creativity

Creativity brings out the best in any individual especially in a competitive field. Advancement in your field helps you stand out despite the saturation in that field. You can't achieve more, you can't be successful when you keep repeating what some other people are doing along side with their flaws and mistake. For you to excel more than your counterparts, you've got to bring in new ideas, new discoveries and new developments. Check out the world best successful men/women. They got to that stage because they never remained stagnant in what had been in existence. But rather they kept discovering more . The more they discover, the more their life became better.

Entertaining distractions

A lot of people have this passion to be successful but get easily distracted by certain things around their environment. It could be friends, addiction, relationship and habits. Your don't have to lead a boring life because you are aiming to be successful. However, there is every need to balance your life and the activities you engage in. In other to accomodate your ambitions. Don't be carried away by things that can't contribute to your growth . Do away with friends that doesn't have any positive impact in your life. Quit any habit that might be gradually ruining your ambitions.

Lack of discipline

You checked your time, is already 5am. You felt like going back to sleep , your eyes Were dim, and your bodies were weak. But you remembered you have a lot to attend to.

Your career, business or skill would be at risk if you succumb to that desire demanding you bounce back to bed. But rather, you got up and began preparing for the activities of the day. Now that is what I term "discipline" Discipline entails you restrict your self from certain pleasures in other to achieve your target. But unfortunately, so many people lack this, and that's why they can't succeed. They want to blow overnight but at the same time they ain't ready to pay the price, they ain't ready to sacrifice their sleep, memorable hang out with friends, chats on phone and so many others.


Practice they say makes perfect.but Is quite unfortunate that so many give up at the early stage of their pursuit, especially when the result ain't forth coming. Success doesn't often come overnight, it requires some period of dedication, commitment, hard work and consistency. When you do things often, there is every tendency that your will become perfect on it in no distant time. And when that happens, success automatically follows as people would began to applaud your efforts. Your business can only succeed when you are always at the shop daily and not weekly. You can only improve in your skills when you engage on it daily and not at your convenient time.


Are you into business, don't wait to become bankrupt or experience failure. before you start thinking of a new business ideas or strategy to adopt in other to improve in your business. It starts now. Don't get carried away by your success. Failure is equally inevitable. It could be at the door anticipating to strike, don't give it that chance by feeling relaxed.

In summary, if you are good, strive to become better, if you are better, strive to be the best. Don't feel relaxed at same level, when you have all it takes, to continue soaring higher.

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Why money does not sustain love

The wrong mindset about love

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Money does not sustain love

I was one of such guys who believed that with wealth, affluence,fame and money. You can easily get any kind of lady succumb to your desire. Hence, to me there was no such thing as love… I met this pretty, gorgeous and charming princess on a wedding event. I got attracted to her beauty and couldn’t wait for the event to be over in other make advances to her. After the event, I approached and tried to woo her, at first she declined, just as usual with “women and their playing hard to get attitude”. However, she later accepted to give me her digit after a little persuasion. I became glad after all, as that seems to mark the beginning of a love history with this pretty damsel, Even though she was yet to accept my proposal. Days rolled into weeks and weeks into month and fortunately, she finally accepted to date me. I thought it was going to be a fling with no sentiment attached….but hell no!!! I was totally wrong as I find my self fallen head over heels in love with this babe… I gave her all the attention she needed, communicates with her on daily basis via calls, chats, and sensational text messages.supports her financially.of course, I made sure she never lacked anything. but amidst of all this, she never reciprocated my love.she picks my calls whenever she likes, she replies my chat whenever she deemed it necessary to And each time i complain, she insults and calls me ” a nag”. To me, she was my priority, while to her, i was only an option. Yet amidst of all this cruel attitude from her i wouldn’t let go because i was needy and already emotionally attached to her…more like an obsession. And you know the funny aspect? She only acts cool and caring towards me whenever she needs financial help from me which I never hesitate to grant her because i thought that with time, she would start considering reciprocating my love owing to the caring attitude I constantly bestowed upon her. Little did I know that she never loved me and would never do she was only using me to satisfy her selfish desire.

The bitter truth

I soon realized my mistakes and got back to my senses and vowed never to impress any Lady with money again.

Listen young man, is either she loves you or not. Stop trying to impress her with your money… True love can never be bought with money. If the only time she remembers you is when she needs something, then you will be saving your self a lot of heart ache and emotional trauma by getting out from such relationship.

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Why you are finding it difficult to move on after the break up.

Are you finding it difficult to move on after the break up?Then read this and find out why.

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Why you are finding it difficult to move on after the break up9

Moving on after a break up has not always been easy. Despite the thousands of published and online articles about the topic. At One time you are good, the next time, you are up with moods swings wishing and hoping that it would all turn out to be a dream.
Healing from a heartbreakis a gradual process, it doesn’t happen overnight. However, in as much as you are still patiently waiting to be completely healed emotional. There are certain things ought to avoid. These are factors which can delay you healing process and make it linger on.


stalking an ex all over every social media is one mistake that most people often do right after break up. To some, the habit has turned to an addition. You keep checking them every now and then on their instagram, facebook whatsapp, to know their recent activities and their relationship status. You keep viewing all their pictures and recent post to know what they’ve been up to, and to also know if you are being missed or had been replaced with another. And once you see something of that nature, the feelings of hurt and rejection resurface again thus making it difficult for you to forget them. Quit stalking them everywhere, quit going to certain places with the Intention of bumping into them . Remember they are “ex’.which implies that their presence in your life has become a past. And so whatever they do should no longer be your concern. This act is unhealthy for you and will make you remain stalk in the heartbreak.

keeping memories.

When you loose a loved one, you can’t get over the lost quickly by constantly staring at the pictures they took when they were alive. The same scenario is applicable here. In other to quicken the healing process, you have to do away with things that keep reminding you of them. It could be a picture taken together when the relationship was was still awesome, it could be a gift they gave you to keep as a memory. Whatever it is, do away with them if it will keep reminding you of them

Keeping in touch

There is nothing wrong with staying friends with your ex, there is nothing wrong with contacting or messaging them once in a while, but not obviously right after the break up. Especially if the feelings are still there. You can’t obviously stop a smoke when you are always close to a fire. Communicating with your ex when you still have feelings for them is just like opening a fresh wound.. And trust me, you wouldn’t like to feel the pain, is better expressed than experienced.

False hope and reassurance

The break up is over, accept it that way and try every possible means to move on. Stop giving yourself false hope or reassurance that your ex might miss you someday. With that you would always keep expecting them back which may not happen.


Stop trying to get back at them by dating their best friend or other farmiliar friends just to make them jealous. That attitude doesn’t usually end up well. If they get to find out that it was all game you will loose at the end because you feel more hurt than you felt initially. If the jealousy you are trying to ignite didn’t get to them, the feelings of rejection will surface again. If you want to move on, quit playing games in the bid to get a revenge and focus on your healing process instead